Forever Young
by Juvenile Success
Summary: Heaven can wait we're only watching the sky, hoping for the best but expecting the worst; are you gonna drop the bomb or not, let us die young or let us live forever. - The story of Pixie Curtis.
1. Chapter 1

**Forever Young**

Pixie Curtis

I represent something different to each of my three brothers. To Darry I am his little sister, the sister he has the power to be that protective older brother. I'm the one that he longs for me to pour my heart out to only to find himself leaning on me for that hope. He's my big brother, the only one I have.

To Sodapop I am his twin sister. His total equal. He's neither older nor younger than me we're the same. We're the ones that expect absolutely nothing of each other just to be ourselves. He expects me to act like myself and tell him what I want and be who I want. He wants me to be me, and he's happy with that.

To Ponyboy I am simply his big sister. I'm the one who is there to wipe the tears, to hold him and promise him that everything will be perfect and we'll survive. I'm there for him whenever he needs me as a sister. No matter how much bigger he gets than me in his eyes I'll always be forever his big sister.

But then the guys all represent something of each of my brothers too. Dally is like Darry, he's an older brother to me. Whereas Steve is like an added wheel making us triplets, he's one of my best friends and like Soda has an unexplainable understanding to who I am and who he is. Then Johnnycakes is like my Ponyboy, my little brother. He doesn't like me to wipe up his tears and talk to him but I'm still here if ever I'm wanted. But Two-Bit's the one that doesn't fit into this world of perfect reasoning. He's never been an older brother, a younger brother or someone full of understanding that they're an equal. He's always just been Two-Bit. I don't think I'll ever understand where Two-Bit fit into all of this. And I'll never rest until I do.

"Pixie!" I heard Soda hollering to me.

I dropped my homework and ignored the thump as the book fell to the floor. I opened my door and ran down the hallway and down the stairs into our lounge room and clasped my hand to my mouth.

"Oh, Ponyboy, what happened?" I whispered rushing to his side and looking at his face.

We were exactly the same height. I was three years older but he'd shot up and I hadn't grown taller in months. My eyes and his met and they begged me to stop mothering him in front of all the guys, they were pleading me and I reluctantly backed off slightly, my eyes narrowed in pure annoyance that I couldn't act as I pleased.

"He got jumped on the way home from the movies," I heard Darry tell me. And boy he didn't look very happy about it. "He was walking home _alone_," Darry said looking at Ponyboy pointedly.

"From school?" I asked and I saw Pony shoot me a warning glance, I might have been sounding motherly but I couldn't help it. "Because you should have gotten a lift with Steve or Two-Bit."

Pony threw me a look that told me to shut it. "No, from the movies."

I sighed. I couldn't help it even though he looked like he wanted to kill me there and then. "Pony, I would have gone with you, hell anything to escape algebra," I said pulling a slight face.

"And I was gonna ask you to help me!" Steve moaned loudly. I smiled slightly, that was what I was to Steve, and Two-Bit when he could be bothered with homework, a personal tutor.

"Pony, next time ask one of the _guys_," Darry said stressing on the word 'guys', "Or carry a blade," he sighed. "Ponyboy, for once would you just think."

I must have looked ready to start an argument with Darry that I was just as good as any of the guys but Soda gave me a small shove and when I looked at him he nodded towards Pony who was standing there awkwardly listening to Darry lecture him.

"Darry, just shut up," I said loudly grabbing Pony's arm, "I'm gonna check him over, okay?"

Darry looked very ready to tell me not to tell him to shut up but I was already dragging Pony to the bathroom and Soda had begun to point out that had Pony been carrying a blade it would have been a good reason for him to be jumped. And also that Darry would have been pissed about that anyway.

I pushed Pony into the bathroom and stepped inside closing and locking the door, now I was planning on mothering him whether he liked it or not but I'd at least be nice about it so that there was no way of the others getting in and seeing. He saw this and gave me a soft smile before sitting on the bathtub.

"So, Pony, why didn't you call anyone?" I began as I kneeled down to check out his face. "That's one nasty cut you got there,"

Pony rolled his eyes at me but I gave him a look that said don't-mess-with-me so he didn't tell me off for mothering him.

"Because I never would have been able to see the movie," he explained and I had to smile; none of us really had the patience to watch a whole movie. I had tried once and fell asleep.

"Oh I knew that, but you could have called someone to pick you up," I pointed out as I walked to the cabinet to get some cream for the cut, "I would have personally picked you up if there was a car here, you know that. I would have walked there for you."

"Yeah, well I didn't want to put anyone out," Pony told me. He barely winced as I put the cream on the cut, I would have. I bet it stung like hell. "And it would've been worse if you came to get me, Pixie."

"True," I smiled. "But I'd walk over coals for you, Ponyboy,"

Pony didn't respond to that but instead stared down at his feet. I got up and put the cream away and sat down on the rim of the bath next to Ponyboy and stared down at my own feet.

"You know I only mother you 'cause I love you, Ponyboy," I told him softly.

He nodded. "Yeah I know that,"

"And it bugs you a lot," I had to smile. "I'm sorry about that. But well someone has to do it. And Darry doesn't ever do it right. He just yells at you, but he does love ya, Pony, he just don't know how to express it." I told him that because I knew that was the truth and I knew deep down that somewhere inside him Pony honestly didn't know that.

"Maybe," Pony said sounding awfully bitter. "But if he does think that then why can't he just stop yelling at me, Pixie?"

I sighed and looked at him in the eyes. "I don't know Ponyboy. But it was like when mom and dad died. We all cried. He barely did. It's his way of approaching things, we all show love maybe he just doesn't,"

"He loves you and Soda, he shows that," Ponyboy said staring back into my eyes looking for something, just searching.

"Ponyboy, I honestly don't know. But I'm not lying when I say he loves you," Ponyboy looked away and I looked once at his face, "Don't worry about the cut, it won't scar, and the bruise makes you look tough kid,"

He gave me a small smile and a look as if to say 'thanks' and I stood up and smiled slightly. I unlocked the door and Ponyboy stood up. I think he really needed that little pep talk because he did look a bit better than before at least, well in his eyes you could see that hope again. As I pushed the door open I stepped out and came back into the bustling and busy lives inside the Curtis household. I'd barely walked five steps when Soda pulled me onto the couch in a big hug.

"What's that for?" I laughed as I turned to look at him with a smile.

He kissed my cheek and I stared at him. "For just being you,"

"Okay," I laughed smiling. "Where'd that all come from?"

"Your talk with Ponyboy," Soda said in a low voice so none of our rather nosey gang would hear. "I think it helped a lot more than mine do." Soda told me nodding at Pony who was talking to Johnny and actually smiling pretty happily.

I nodded and looked back to my twin. "I sure hope it did. Soda, I worry about him sometimes,"

"Yeah well he's tough," Soda said.

He didn't understand. Well I never really expected him to. Soda thinks that Pony is still grieving over our parents which is why he's all paranoid over the fact he thinks Darry doesn't love him, Darry of course doesn't know this. I'm the only one that's looked close enough to see Pony really does believe this lie he's told himself.

"Yeah I know," I said softly slipping his arm off of me. "Let me know when dinners ready, I have to do homework,"

"Why?" Soda asked me looking puzzled, he never understood my need to do homework, not because of Darry's nagging but because I knew it was my way out.

"Because I have to or I'll get in trouble," I said simply standing up. "And don't scream that it's ready, just get off your ass and come to my room." He smirked, I told him this everyday and he never listened. "This time I'm serious, Soda, if you don't I shall not come to dinner and Darry will get mad and if he doesn't drag me down there I won't eat at all and I'll fade away completely."

"Sure you're serious," Soda grinned.

I rolled my eyes. Okay I was serious about it but I wasn't gonna starve myself because my twin was too lazy to come and get me, 'cause that was plain stupid. Besides one of these days he'll learn to do it 'cause I swear Darry will kill him about screaming dinners ready all the time.

I walked to the stairs dodging Two-Bit's sprawled figure and his arms as he attempted to pull me onto the ground; something I was used to so was getting used to having to dodge him everytime I wished to leave or enter the room. He did grab my ankle once but Steve saw and called him perverted so he sat up to protest and let go at the same time. I grinned to Steve and disappeared upstairs to my room and closed my door.

I picked up my fallen math book and found my pencil underneath my bed. Sitting cross-legged on my bed my maths book in my lap I glanced to my homework. I only had three problems left and they made no sense. I sighed loudly, I'd done absolutely everything and I had put these off because they were so annoyingly hard. I hated algebra so much, it was the worse bit in maths, other than algebra I could stand it but the letters totally lost me.

I sighed again and placed the book on my bed and opened my door and slowly walked down the hall and opened Ponyboy and Soda's bedroom door and gave him a sad smile.

"I'm stuck again, can you help me please?" I asked clasping my hands together as if to beg him.

Pony grinned. I did this all the time. He was the only one of us that actually understood maths, it's his genius IQ or something, I tease him about that all the time but then beg for help, kinda ironic I know. Besides Pony was actually in my math class so you know.

"Like I could refuse you, big sis," Pony smiled.

"Thank god," I sighed loudly. "This stuff is evil you know,"

"Not really,"

"Oh shut up with the whole nerd thing, Pony, it is evil," I exclaimed dramatically. "Steve will agree, won't ya, Steve?" I shouted over the banister on the way back to my room.

"What?" Steve shouted back from the lounge.

"Just say yes!" I shouted back. "It's about the evil of math!"

"Yes!" He shouted back.

I flashed Pony a grin and he laughed at me. "Told ya,"

Ponyboy just laughed at me and it only took him fifteen minutes to explain the problems to me so I had them all finished and offered him mine to copy. He normally says no but he gladly accepted it this time, I think it was because it was a Friday and no one wants to do homework on a weekend.


	2. Chapter 2

I left Ponyboy to go do his homework and found myself walking back into the lounge room. Steve and Soda were arm wrestling, I'll never understand the joy in doing that but hey they were guys and who ever understands guys? I don't despite the fact I'm friends with so many.

On coming in I wasn't so lucky at avoiding Two-Bit as he immediately grabbed my ankle and pulled me down, and I just so happened to have landed on top of him and it just so happened that Dally walked in then and saw it.

"God, you're so perverted," Dally said shaking his head as he sat down.

"I am not perverted!" Two-Bit said indignantly and I fell off of him rubbing my ankle.

"You call grabbing Pixie's ankle everytime she walks past you in the hope you'll pull her onto the floor not perverted?" Dally asked him sarcastically and Steve and Soda looked over and smirked. "'Cause I have to question what you see as perverted or not now."

"I always did question that," I said loudly sitting up. "So there was a reason why Mom and Dad bought a lock for the bathroom all those years ago."

They all laughed but Two-Bit threw me a grin. "Why of course I was perverted when I was thirteen and you were, what?"

"Twelve," I said dryly. "Honestly wouldn't surprise me there,"

Soda smiled. "So that's why Two-Bit's friends with us!" he exclaimed loudly. "To perve on Pixie!"

"Well I always did have a bit of a thing for brunettes," Two-Bit said slinging an arm around me.

I laughed, "Oh I'm so flattered for all your attention, Two-Bit, I've been just waiting for this day since, well, forever!"

We all laughed and Darry came in and looked at us all suspiciously. Not that that was too unusual or anything, he often looked at us as if we should be carted off to the crazy bin.

"Did I hear you correctly, Soda, he's here to perve on Pixie?" Darry asked, and his eyes were narrowed even more dangerously than well I've ever seen them.

I giggled and Soda grinned. "Why yes you did hear me correctly,"

"But we were only joking," I spoke up smiling at Darry. "Well I was at least,"

"Oh I am hurt, Pixie," Two-Bit said loudly pulling a sad face.

I giggled and slowly stood up, "So you should be, since well, who wouldn't want me?"

"I don't!" Dallas, Steve and Soda, yes Soda, said loudly at once.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Steve, you have a girlfriend, I'm bloody glad you don't want me, Dally, whatever," I shrugged and he smirked. "And Soda, I'm your twin, if you wanted me I would be very scared."

"True, true," Soda grinned up at me.

Darry stared at us all weirdly and finally said. "Okay well dinners ready,"

"I'll get, Pony," I offered and before Darry could refuse me or someone else could offer I headed up the stairs.

Because I knew Pony still wasn't in the mood to talk to Darry. Dally and Steve never would have offered. Two-Bit and Soda likely would have just screamed it was ready or jumped on his bed ruining him doing his homework and well Johnny wasn't even here. So it was up to me. Besides he still had my math homework.

"Hey, Ponyboy," I said and he glanced up, "Dinners ready,"

"Okay," he said putting away his homework.

Very smart. Seeing as he shared this room with Soda and most likely he would, not on purpose of course, lose it, destroy it totally or spill something on it. Seriously, wouldn't be the first time either.

"So ya doing anything tonight ,Pony?" I asked him as he followed me downstairs.

"Going to the movies with Johnny and Dal,"

"Don't you ever get sick of movies?" I asked him curiously. "They're only stupid beach films,"

"Nah I don't, you go to them often enough," Ponyboy pointed out as we walked into the dining room.

I'm gonna guess Soda and Steve guessed what we were saying since well Pony's pretty quiet and I am when I'm talking to him cos they both shared a look with me and I smiled slightly my face a shade or two pinker than I would have liked to.

"Yeah well, Pony, that's a whole lot different," I said simply not wanting to go further into me going to the movies topic, one I didn't wish to discuss with the gang, my older and younger brother, Soda's another story I didn't mind him knowing but that's different. "So, are you all going out too?"

"I'm going to get drunk," Two-Bit said sounding almost proud.

I stared at him a brow raised. "Uh huh, and you're happy about that why?"

"Because -" Two-bit began.

"He's a drunk," Dally finished smirking.

"I am not!" Two-Bit protested.

I nodded slightly. "Whatever. You two?" I asked Steve and Soda knowing perfectly well what the two of them were planning on doing.

"Got us a couple of dates!" Soda said proudly.

I grinned. "Hmm, and would these dates just happen to go by the names of Sandy and Evie, I wonder?"

"Yeah perhaps they do," Soda replied with a grin.

"Wow, am I just a total psychic or are you two and these ladies getting awfully serious?" I asked then smiling coyly.

"Perhaps we are getting serious," Soda said thoughtfully and Steve elbowed him in the ribs. "Not that _I_ would be like that though,"

"Sure," Steve coughed. "Sorry, choked there a bit,"

Darry was glaring at us all whilst Dally and Two-Bit were quite happy to watch our conversation and the look on Darry's face.

"Mmm, and you know what comes with being serious," I started.

"Pixie!" Darry hissed.

I flashed him a smile, "I was only gonna say what comes with being serious is marriage, Dar, jeez what did you think I was gonna say?" He never replied but instead glowered at me. He knew perfectly well that I wasn't gonna say it but was merely doing this to tease him as the three of us often did, "Besides its just wouldn't it be great if you all got married, _had_ to get married."

I bit my lip to keep from laughing and Steve was staring at the wall concentrating awfully hard on chewing. Soda kept looking at me and I had to avoid looking at him cos I knew I'd be in fits of laughter. Dallas was smirking and Two-Bit was grinning happily. Pony was staring at his food and Darry was scowling at me like you'd never believe.

We did this joke on him all the time you'd think he'd learn to relax. We'd never actually touch this topic at the dinner table, he knew we wouldn't yet he always freaked out, besides ew, I did not want to discuss that with any of them, no thanks. Steve and Soda I have one or twice but that's different. They ain't the others especially Dar who's freaking out at the thought of it.

"So, Darry, are you going to do anything tonight?" I asked him finally once I had fully composed myself.

He was still glowering at me but shook his head. "No I'm not. Are you?"

"Nope," I said rolling my eyes. "I have decided that Jason is officially the biggest loser on this planet and if he dares to ask me out again I will hit him." I said smiling sweetly. "And I am not going into details as I imagine he probably wants to live his life and fulfill his life dream of being the biggest sleaze."

Ponyboy excused himself at that point. I felt a little guilty for making him feel uncomfortable, he was kinda used to this talk from the three of us and we only ever did it teasingly, I'll apologize to him once I left, I told myself. Dallas was staring at me with a slightly pissed expression and Two-Bit looked so sad but Darry looked half angry and half sad. I'm not sure why though. Oh wait. I just remembered what I told them. Smart one Pixie, you're so smart.

"He didn't…did he?" Darry asked softly.

"You think I'm like that?" I replied.

"No, but guys are." Darry said.

I smirked and looked down shaking my head. "Funnily enough they are." I glanced up. "I have values, Darry, I don't plan on screwing up my life. I want out of this dump, Darry, I don't want to stay here and live this life again."

No one said anything. Steve and Soda both knew this, I told them this ages ago. Back when we all started to date. They didn't understand it but seeing as they're both like best friends they respected it. I had to love them for that. I didn't expect Dally or Two-Bit to understand, but I hoped Darry would.

"Look," I said standing up. "Don't worry about me; I can take care of myself. That's something I can do by myself and no guy is gonna mess it up for me."

I gave him a small smile and walked out of the room. I let out a sigh and held onto the doorframe into the lounge room. Taking a deep breath I began to walk upstairs to talk to Ponyboy, I bit my lip, boy did I feel bad. He wouldn't understand like those guys did then, like Johnny those two didn't understand the dating game. Boy would this be hard to do.

"Hey, Pon," I said standing by his door.

He glanced up, "Oh hey, Pixie," he said looking a bit pink.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to make you nervous," I said softly.

"Nah you didn't," Ponyboy lied to me. "Just didn't feel like seeing Darry's reaction that's all,"

"Your lying, Pony, but seriously I'll try not to do that again," I told him giving him a small smile. "You're getting so tall you know."

I bit my lip and I felt like crying desperately. Who would have known that one day I'd be apologizing to my kid brother about nearly talking about my non existent sex life to him and standing watching him getting ready to go out on a Friday night. I wanted to cry that he was still my baby and he had to stay young like back when our parents were around. He was such a kid then. I used to be taller than him then but he was so tall and he looked so older…he'd seen too much too early. So had I, but I felt so guilty that I hadn't protected him.

"Uh thanks, Pixie," he stammered looking under his bed for something.

I felt Soda brush past me. This was his room after all. He began changing into some clothes for tonight. He didn't even bother to shove me out of the room. I was his sister, so what if I saw him in his underwear? No big deal. But as I watched Ponyboy desperately tidying up I began to cry and I grabbed him in a hug.

"Pixie, are you alright?" I heard him say.

"Oh, Ponyboy," I said softly. "I'm so sorry, I should have protected you from all of this, you're still a little baby after all, my little baby aren't ya?"

I have a feeling if I had of seen his face then it would have either been full of hatred for being all motherly, or totally scared or even totally confused and full of worry. I'm opting for a combination of three cos as I hugged him he slowly patted my back.

"Pixie, what's wrong with you?"

"Oh, Pony, you'll always be my baby right?" I asked him letting go and staring at him.

I have a feeling he was gonna respond no but Soda grabbed him and me and hugged us both together.

"Pixie, stop freaking out, Ponyboy's just growing up okay he's not leaving us yet, he's only a bit taller but he's the same Pony," Soda told me, and I think he was also telling this to Pony. "Just like when you became a teenager, Pix, with me and Steve, you were the same Pixie just looking more womanly," he grinned.

I was crying but laughing as I hit him. "Bully,"

"You love me," he smiled letting the two of us go. "So please for all our sakes don't go being all soppy now, Pixie, cos you'll scare everyone, truly you will."

I grinned and hit him again. "Oh stop being mean, I'll tell Sandy," I threatened.

"Sure you will."

"I will too!" I cried out. "'Cause I'm your twin she'll believe me, I know all your secrets,"

"I know all yours," he replied. "So don't try it."

"But I ain't got no one no more," I said, I couldn't resist but grin, he knew I was teasing but hey maybe not…

"Pixie!" Soda cried throwing me on the bed. "You will not!"

I giggled as Soda started to tickle me. "Soda stop it!" I shrieked. "Pony, help!"

"You're on your own," I saw him smile. "See ya two later,"

"Pony!" I wailed but it was too late he'd already disappeared. "Soda!" I laughed. "Okay seriously stop it, Soda!"

"Not 'til you say you won't!" Soda grinned at me.

"I won't! I won't!" I yelled loudly laughing hard. "Ow, Soda, please stop!"

"Nah," Soda grinned.

I pulled a face and suddenly Soda was pulled off me and I saw Steve standing next to him and grinning down at me on the bed and I saw Two-Bit standing by the door.

"Never thought I'd see the day where I saw Pixie Curtis lying in bed with someone on top of her," Steve grinned.

Soda punched him in the arm and I sat up and glared.

"Steve, stop being a creep! You and the perve really creep me out," I declared.

Soda laughed. "Yeah, stay away from my sister or you'll face me!"

Steve simply pushed him on the bed. "I'd like to see you try. Now are ya coming or what?"

"I'm coming," Soda said kissing my cheek randomly, "Catch ya later, sis,"

I stared at him weirdly and watched the two of them disappear. I rolled my eyes at the thought of Soda actually trying to do something to Steve. It'd be more funny than dangerous I should think. I sighed loudly for some reason and stood up only to realize Two-Bit was still there.


	3. Chapter 3

"Why hello," I smiled. "Totally spaced out there, forgot you were even here."

"How can you forget about me?" Two-Bit asked pretending to be hurt. "Don't ya love me or something?"

"Course I don't, who'd love you," I teased.

"Me?"

I giggled. "You and only your reflection."

"Now hurry up we're going out to Bucks."

"Darry will never let me. And I don't wanna go out tonight anyway," I told him. "And was that asking me or telling me? 'Cause no one tells me what to do,"

"I'm telling you what to do, and I'll drag you there if I have to and Darry's letting you, so just move your butt." Two-Bit said. And the scary thing is he looked deadly serious that he'd drag me there.

"Um, okay," I said looking at him weirdly. "You're serious aren't you?"

"Yes I am." He said then flashing a Two-Bit grin. "Hurry up,"

I rolled my eyes, "Yes, sir," I said saluting him, "Let me get ready, I'll be oh, an hour or two,"

I burst out laughing at his face and promised him I'd be pretty fast and hurried off to my room to go get changed. I'd never been to one of Buck's parties before, well never with permission. Soda, Steve and I did once when my parents were alive and Dally found us and told us to get our butts home or he will skin us alive. But we ignored him and I'm so embarrassed to say we all got smashed and Dally was forced to cover for us. He's never forgotten trust me.

I quickly put on a pair of good jeans, 'cause it's not smart to wear a skirt to a party, really I did once and I discovered how unwise it was. I changed into a singlet top and considered not bringing a jacket but grabbed a light one anyway. I decided to not bother with makeup; it's all a waste 'cause no one ever notices it. I gave my hair a brush and ran down the stairs.

"I am here!" I said dramatically walking into the lounge, "See you later, Dar, I'll be home on time I promise, if I'm not he's drunk and I'm figuring out how to steal Dallys car keys," I smiled.

Darry smiled, to my amazement I thought he'd more be looking apprehensive or something, but oh well. "Okay well have fun, I'll wait up for you,"

"Don't," I told him giving him a hug. "You have to work, Darry, just make Soda stay up," I giggled. "Who cares about him?"

"Charming," Darry said rolling his eyes and going back to his paper.

I grinned and Two-Bit stuck out his arm and I put mine through his. I glanced back at Darry to see him shaking his head and chuckling. Oh well it was all in good fun as Two-Bit led me in the direction of Buck Merril's house. But we both soon gave up with linking arms since he was taller than me and instead his arm found its way around my shoulders. I didn't complain like I normally would because well it was cold, and I should have worn a thicker jacket, but that's me for you, I don't quite think about that.

"So seriously what did you do to let Darry allow me to come to this party?" I finally asked Two-Bit about a block away from the party.

"Nothing." Two-Bit shrugged.

I raised my brows. "Seriously now, what did you do?"

"Nothing, he told me to take you. Says you needa spend more time havin' fun," Two-Bit grinned, "And who better to have fun with than me."

"Oh so not stuck up are you," I said sarcastically smiling. Then I groaned. "Ugh Dals at the movies with Pony and Johnny, if you get drunk I'll have to call one of them,"

Two-Bit shook his head. "Ah I won't get drunk,"

I stared at him. "Two-Bit, it's nice that you'll try not to, but you probably will," I said, trying to say it as nicely as I could, since to be honest the number of times he's said this and its never happened isn't at all funny.

"No really, I won't," he said looking well, serious. Shock I know. "Chances are the regulars are already drunk by now and it's no fun drinking on your own,"

"I can drink!" I exclaimed.

"Yeah you can but you don't," Two-Bit said almost completely ignoring me, "Anyway, if that's what it's gonna be like we ain't staying there."

"And where do you plan on going, Two-Bit?" I asked, I couldn't help but slightly roll my eyes, he was just so odd sometimes, and the strange thing is he took the whole 'going out on Friday' so seriously, well so it seemed.

"Movies,"

"Movies bore me, I'd rather go home."

Two-Bit sighed a loud fake sigh. "Yeah but we can sneak up on the two little rugrats and scare 'em, Pixie, but I suppose if _you really _want to go home after that I'll take you back."

I smirked. I knew what he was playing at. He wanted me to protest and argue until I realized how stupid I was being and he'd get his way. Two-Bit played this silly little game with me since forever. I'd long learnt exactly how it would go if I followed Two-Bit. I'd end up doing something I didn't want to do and would get in trouble, but I shrugged, oh well maybe tonight was the night to play by his rules, after all you only live once right?

I followed Two-Bit into Bucks party and pulled a slight face. When I was fifteen the thought of going to one of his parties was so exciting. And the only one I'd been to had been of course the greatest, well that's what I'd thought at the time but coming in here now I realized that well there was nothing actually that special about one of these parties.

The majority of the people in the rooms were smashed to say the least, chicks were all over guys, and the only thing that looked remotely interesting was a game of poker some guys who looked slightly sober were playing, even the music was rubbish. It was just loud, I mean I wouldn't classify it as music, it was just stupid.

Two-Bit barely noticed my face, which I think was filled with a look that said this-is-stupid but instead handed me a beer. I groaned inwardly. For starters I didn't drink, Darry would probably kill me and I'd only drunk a few times, when I got drunk at fifteen, at a few parties I had but never really drank seriously 'cept for the one time. And personally I didn't like the taste, I thought it was gross but I didn't say anything.

I had barely had half, which I promise you I was drinking very reluctantly, when I 'accidentally' spilt it. Two-Bit never even noticed, he was on his second or maybe third and was a little tipsy I think. But he'd at last seen my expression of pure boredom and the look in my eyes telling him plainly homework would have been more fun so he decided that we were going to crash in on whatever Johnny, Pony and Dally, if he'd even stuck around, were up to.

"Two-Bit, is it always that boring?" I finally exclaimed about two blocks away from the party and not too far away from the nightly double. "I don't know how you stand it,"

"That wasn't boring!" Two-Bit protested. "You just don't know what fun was if it hit you in the face!"

I rolled my eyes, _sure_ I didn't. "Uh huh, Two-Bit, I just think you're not wholly yourself tonight," I said sweetly.

"Am too!" he retorted.

"Sure you are," I laughed. "C'mon lets race, if you can't beat me your not yourself,"

"Okay!" Two-Bit said enthusiastically.

I held back my laughter. I always beat him, sober or not. I amazingly could run, probably because I never smoked unlike him, that or he was unfit. He had to be a little off his face cos he normally would remember this if he was sober.

"Okay well, ready, set, go!" I cried and ran full sprint ahead.

I was laughing loudly by the time I reached the nightly double. He was far behind me but was slowly catching up as I halted to a stop he came next to me and glared at me, he knew I was right. I giggled and threw my arms around him.

"See you should always listen to me, but I forgive you," I declared.

Two-Bit laughed and we snuck around to the hole in the fence where we normally entered. I used to feel bad about not paying but unlike the others guys who do that just 'cause they feel like it I realized that I could because I never watched the movie anyway so why waste money getting in when you wouldn't see what you paid for? So I never bothered no more.

Once I'd gotten through I stood up and brushed myself off. Waiting for Two-Bit we then set off for the seated section inside the nightly double. We passed all the cars and I few people I knew gave me a bit of a wave or a nod and I did the same back. A couple of soc's eyed us but we ignored them totally and finally landed by the seats.


	4. Chapter 4

"There they are, Two-Bit," I told him pointing to the first row, "Ohh, who are they sitting with?" I wondered to myself, since I doubted Two-Bit would know.

"Come on, Pixie, just be quiet, okay?" Two-Bit said hushing me.

I rolled my eyes and unlike him who was actually crouching down to the front I was walking perfectly normally. I knew he wanted to scare them and as funny as it probably would be, I didn't want to receive a death stare from Ponyboy for a week because I interrupted whatever date _thing_ he was going on. Nuh uh, not on my life, I actually quite liked talking to my little brother.

"What are two greasers like you doing with two soccy girls?" Two-Bit said loudly in a deep voice, his hand on Johnny's shoulder.

I saw Johnny jump and his face relaxed as he turned and saw it was just Two-Bit, both boys looked thoroughly relieved about that. I walked over and hit Two-Bit's arm as I heard him apologize to Johnny.

"He is being such an ass tonight," I told my brother and Johnny, "Seriously totally rude," I said glowering at Two-Bit, okay maybe not totally but what he just did was mean, especially to poor Johnny who'd only gotten jumped not too long ago, he's been even quieter since.

The two girls they were sitting with turned around. The one with red hair as in one of my classes and a head cheerleader, I doubted she knew who I was and to be honest I didn't care. I'd say she was a snob at first glance. The other one was Marcia someone, she was in a fair few of my classes, she was nice enough I guessed.

"That's my older sister, Pixie Curtis," I heard Pony say, "And that's -"

"Two-Bit Matthews." Two-Bit grinned, interrupting him, "You are?"

"Cherry Valance," the red head spoke up, even the name sounded snobby. "That's my friend Marcia." I gave them a small smile and saw Cherry eyeing me, "Say, are you in our year?"

"I think so," I said casually.

"Are you Sodapop Curtis' twin sister?" Marcia asked flashing me a friendly smile.

I smiled back; I suppose they were nice enough, for soc's. "Yeah I am."

"You're in some of my classes aren't you?" Marcia smiled.

"I think so, maybe," I shrugged just standing there with Two-Bit. "Hey, Two-Bit, I think I saw someone we know we should go, _now_,"

I don't think he got my hint that perhaps we were interrupting something though. I mean no offense to my brother or Johnny but they would have gotten no where with the soc girls, besides I could have sworn Cherry was dating one of those irritating football players. But instead of seeing my hint he actually looked around and then actually did find someone we know.

"Oh you mean Jason?" Two-Bit asked loudly. "Why do you want to see him? I thought you said before that you weren't going back to him?"

"I did," I said through gritted teeth as unfortunately Jason actually did spot us. Great. "Two-Bit, think for once would ya!"

Two-Bit looked stunned at my annoyance but I think he slowly understood what I meant. I really did think Two-Bit was great but Jesus I just wish he'd stop playing dumb; because he is smart I know that. I didn't have the time to apologize because like I said Jason saw us and now was coming over.

I groaned to myself and the two girls both got slightly bored by this and turned back around to the movie, so did Johnny, but I don't think he even realized why I was upset with this. Pony did and his eyes were following me, I could feel them. Two-Bit just put up almost a brotherly defense of me and put his arm around my shoulder. As slightly irritated as I was with Two-Bit I wanted Jason to get the hint that I wasn't his no more, not that I ever was. Because no one, well maybe Darry cos of the whole guardian thing, owns me.

"Hey, Pixie, do you think that maybe we could talk?" Jason asked trying to smile at me.

I stared at him coldly. "You can talk here."

"But it's about what happened last week," he begun.

"Fine," I said curtly. No way was I talking about this in front of those soccy girls and Pony and the two guys, nuh uh.

"Can we go somewhere then, Pixie, please?" he asked pleadingly.

I felt my shield begin to crumble. I always fell for his eyes. Maybe he meant it this time, maybe he really meant not to do what he tried, maybe he didn't but when I was with him I did feel special, I'd have to see what he says.

"Okay," I said smiling softly. "But I'm coming right back here," I told Two-Bit, so he knew if I wasn't back to come after me.

Two-Bit nodded and Jason grabbed my hand but I pulled away and he scowled slightly then put on a smile. God he really did think he was God's gift to women or something. What a jerk.

"Look, Pixie, I'm real sorry about last week," Jason begun once we were both in his car. Why his car was there if he was on his own was a story I didn't wish to go into, not yet at least.

"So you should be," I replied folding my arms across my chest.

His smile faltered slightly. "But I thought you were ready for that Pixie, I thought we'd waited long enough."

"Jason," I told him, my eyes were narrowed, and I could feel my temper slowly flaring up. "I told you when we first started going out I wasn't like those girls, and nothing would change that."

"But I thought you loved me," he said quietly his eyes blazing. "If you do you would have."

"If you loved me you wouldn't have tried it on when you knew I didn't want that," I hissed opening the door and then glancing back. "Jason, you know perfectly well what you did, if it had of worked you know what you would have done?"

"What?" he demanded with the same anger.

"You would have raped me," I told him grimly with all the anger I could muster. "You're a jerk, Jason Armstrong, and a sleaze and you tried to rape me. Just be glad my brothers, or Dallas Winston for that matter, don't know. Otherwise you'd be dead." I stepped out of the car and leaned in again, "Come near me again, Jason, and they'll find out, try that with some other girl I'll let everyone know what you're really like. Now go get a fucking life,"

I slammed the door in his face and walked back to the seats smiling with triumph. I never swore, well barely, not _that_ word at least; I only did if I was angry or very scared. I never really threatened people either…but Jason didn't count as a person, he was the scum of the earth he deserved whatever he got. But he really was one lucky guy for me not telling people, trust me on that. If I did, which I won't as it's kinda embarrassing, he'd be dead. No joke there.

"Pixie!" I heard Dallas call out.

I didn't see him but someone had latched onto my arm and I turned and gave him a slight smile.

"Oh hey, Dallas," I said as he released my arm.

"He didn't try nothin', did he?" Dally demanded his eyes narrowed. "Jason, I mean,"

Oh. Two-Bit must of told him, so he hadn't totally cleared off then. "Oh, no. I just told him something, don't worry about me, Dally, I'm fine,"

"You sure?"

"I'm positive. Trust me I've got a lot to hold against him, I'll be fine," I smiled up to him, "You coming back?"

"Nah, Tim's looking for me," Dally said shiftily, what had he been doing now? "I'll see ya around, Pixie,"

"Sure," I said and I watched him walk away.

I sighed slightly, when would Dally ever learn to stop doing stupid things. I really didn't want to know what he'd done this time. I'd find out soon enough I suppose, I mean if it was bad I'd be the one patching up the injury. Like normal.

As I walked back to where my brother and the guys and the two soc girls were sitting, I saw them standing up and I saw both my brother and Two-Bit give a smile of relief as they saw me coming back. Clearly Dally wasn't the only one who'd known of Jason's intentions. When would they learn I could take care of myself? Never I guess.

"We're gonna go home now, Pixie," Two-Bit told me with a grin as I came back.

I nodded with a smile, "Okay, I saw Dally," I said casually, by now I figured he was the one sent to go look for me.

"Oh, yeah," Two-Bit said looking away.

I smirked to myself and shook my head. I followed behind them all with Johnnycakes. Two-Bit and the Marcia girl were talking quite excitedly to each other about something or another. And Ponyboy and that Cherry girl, I'm telling you she's a first class snob if I've ever seen one, were talking, I doubt they have anything in common, ugh there was just something about that girl, I tell you she's trouble. I can tell.

We were out of the Nightly Double and apparently we were walking the two girls' home, I didn't mind too much. I mean Darry couldn't freak out that much since I was with three of the guys anyway, but it was more the fact I saw a soc car following us. I heard Cherry say something, apparently from what I gathered it was hers and Marcia's boyfriends, who they dumped at the movies because they were drinking or something. Perhaps the two were smart about guys and drinking.

"Hey, Two-Bit, you do know that there's a car trailing us," I called out; I think I must have sounded worried because he gave me a slight smile as if to reassure me.

I can't remember what was said as my brain was kinda blocking it out. I tried to follow what was happening but they were all shouting and I just closed my eyes for a moment to try block it all out. It was just so weird all of a sudden but I saw Two-Bit hand Ponyboy a smashed soda bottle and I had half a mind to wring my little brothers neck there and then.

"Look, Bob, just calm down, we'll come home with you," I heard Cherry say loudly.

I watched as Ponyboy and her talked for a minute before her and Marcia got into the soc's car. I watched as they drove away and I turned to see Ponyboy drop the bottle and it shattered onto the ground.

"Two-Bit, how could you give him that?" I cried out angrily staring at him, boy was I was mad. "He's just a kid he cannot do that! He cannot get involved in fights, Two-Bit!"

"I am not a kid!" Ponyboy protested, oops I forgot about the whole 'motherly' thing again. "I can fight!"

"No you can't!" I snapped. I really should shut up about now but well I did not like any of them fighting, I at least had some say over Ponyboy. "You're only a kid I don't want you messed up in that and you!" I said poking Two-Bit in the stomach. "Don't you go encouraging him giving him that got it?"

Two-Bit just rolled his eyes and grinned. "Wow, you really do sound like a mom when you're pissed off, and you're supposed to love that kid."

I glared at him. "I do not! I just care! He's only a kid!"

"Pixie, shut up! You're not Mom!" Ponyboy snapped…oops I really did seem to have pissed him off. "I'll see you at home."


	5. Chapter 5

I froze on the spot and watched Ponyboy and Johnny head for home. Two-Bit put his arm around me and I didn't even shrug him off. I felt a tear slip down my face and I hurriedly wiped it away, I didn't want Two-Bit to see that I was upset.

"I don't act like my mom do I?" I asked him quietly as we began to walk home.

Two-Bit didn't answer at first. I didn't think he would until he spoke. "You know sometimes you do but it's not in a bad way or nothin' I mean the kid needs a mom its just you're his sister not his mom. I don't think he wants you to be that, that's all."

"Oh," I said softly biting my lip. "I don't mean to either but no one else ever forces him to not do things, I mean Darry tries but you've seen him, he doesn't do it right, he just yells,"

"And what was that then?" Two-Bit snorted.

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Oh shut up."

"Fine,"

"Aw I didn't mean literally!" I laughed to him.

Two-Bit grinned down to me. "Good I wasn't gonna, so did ya tell Jason exactly what you thought?"

"I swore at him," I told Two-Bit flushing slightly.

"Pixie you didn't!" he cried out happily. "I didn't know you knew how to swear though,"

"Two-Bit!" I laughed. "Of course I can,"

"Uh huh sure," Two-Bit smirked.

I rolled my eyes and I lost my smile thinking about Ponyboy slightly. "So you reckon he really thinks I'm being like my mom?"

"I dunno," Two-Bit shrugged.

I bit my lip and sighed. I hoped he didn't. My mom was a great person. I could never live up to be even a little like her. I mean I was his sister, sometimes I acted motherly but I felt I had to; he needed some sort of woman in his life that wasn't a girlfriend or something. I hoped none of the others saw me trying to replace my mom, because I wasn't. Oh this was so weird.

"Hey Pixie I'll see you tomorrow," Two-Bit said suddenly, "You'll be fine walking home on your own right?"

I nodded and saw we had just passed the lot, I was only one block away from home, "I'll be fine okay, I'll see you later."

"Bye Pixiedust!" Two-Bit shouted loudly once I'd turned away.

I laughed and gave him a wave. Smiling at the thought of Two-Bit just grinning to himself on the way home made me laugh. Shaking my head I crossed my arms over my chest and I bit my lip again. I hated fighting with people, especially my brothers. I wanted to talk to him but I have a feeling I would be getting the cold shoulder for awhile, well at least for tonight.

Letting out another sigh I pushed open our gate and closed it silently. Walking up our porch I opened our front door and then walked into our lounge room to see Darry still up talking quietly to Sodapop. They both shut up as soon as they saw me. Weird.

"Hi guys," I sighed sitting on the couch next to Sodapop.

They looked at me and then looked to each other, sharing that brother look, you know the one where they don't know whether to talk to me in case it's a 'girl' issue, trust me I've seen many of those looks since I'd turned thirteen. But mom and I found them more funny than anything else.

But apparently whatever they were talking about was dropped for now, well at least while I was sitting there. I didn't mind, if Soda thought it was important I know he'd tell me, otherwise it was guy business, brother business, and if they didn't want me involved I wouldn't ask to be.

"You 'kay Pixie?" Soda asked me curiously trying to meet my eyes.

I bit my lip and looked at them, "Um I kinda had a fight with Ponyboy…" I trailed off, I knew I looked worried. I felt just awful.

"When did you see Ponyboy?" Darry demanded. Oh right I was meant to be at Bucks the whole night.

"Oh we left Bucks. It was way lame there," I told them, I think Darry looked relieved at that. "We went to the movies but when we left that's when I had it." I said pulling a face.

"Over what?" Sodapop asked me. "You never start fights,"

You know he was right there. I didn't. I barely ever did, and when I did it was never with my brothers at that. It was over Dally getting in too much trouble and worrying us. Two-Bit's drinking, Steve when he's sometimes a jerk and I once considered going over to tell Johnny's parents off, but Johnny looked so scared and so did the guys at what they might do. So Soda had to stick me in my room and wouldn't let me out until I calmed down. But anyway like I said he really did have a point.

"It wasn't with Pony at first," I sighed staring at my feet. "I told Two-Bit off,"

Darry smirked slightly; as well it was because Two-Bit I'd always bicker with, over the most stupid things too. "What did he do?"

"He gave Ponyboy a smashed pop bottle," I said simply looking up, "I mean okay there were two soc's there but for Christ's sakes he's only fourteen!"

"Socs." Sodapop repeated staring at me. "They were there why?"

"Oh I don't know!" I said shrugging. "All I saw was the damn bottle and I yelled at Two-Bit for giving it to Pony because he's only a kid and he shouldn't be encouraging him to fight."

"Yeah but Pixie they were socs," Soda told me slowly as if I was some sort of idiot. Apparently they all thought I was one when it came to physical fights. "They could have done something,"

"I doubt it."

"What did Ponyboy tell you Pixie?" Darry asked me.

I sighed slightly and pulled a face. "Told me he wasn't a kid and he could fight. Then I said something and he told me to shut up," I couldn't meet their faces then. "He told me to stop being like mom." They said nothing and I wiped at my face then. "But I'm not being like her. Honestly."

"We know Pixie." Darry said quietly. "But he's not that much of a kid. I don't want him fighting either but its not like we can stop him like our parents. We can try but if someone told me that at fourteen I would have ignored them too."

I sighed slightly. "I guess. But it's more the mom thing…"

"Your not being like her Pixie," Soda told me wrapping his arm around me. "She'd have murdered him, you only shouted a little."

I managed a slight smile then. "I guess. Oh you won't believe what jerk I saw tonight," I said rolling my eyes.

"Jason?" Darry demanded glancing to me after looking at the clock.

"Yup,"

"What did he want?" they both demanded looking rather angry.

I giggled slightly. "Don't worry. I only blackmailed him. And I kinda swore," I blushed but I was smiling happily.

Soda burst out laughing. "Trust you to be like that!"

"You know," Darry began.

"I'm fine Dar." I interrupted him throwing him a look. "If I need help I'll get back to you."

Darry glared at me slightly. "Do you know where Ponyboy went? It's almost curfew,"

I glanced at the clock then to Darry and shrugged. "No clue. I'm going to bed. If he's not here in an hour let me know, otherwise wake me if you all wish to die a horrible and miserable death."

"We love you too!" Soda called out grinning as I walked to the stairs.

I laughed and looked back. "I hate you too Sodapop Curtis!"

Soda grinned and I grinned back. Darry didn't find it remotely amusing, only the two of us ever did. The first time we did that my parents honestly thought I hated him but we both laughed and have used that ever since.

Looking at the clock once I shrugged and walked up the stairs and into my room. I saw my homework still sitting there completed. I pulled a face. It might be done but I did not like seeing it, not on a weekend at least, so I shoved it under my bed.

I considered actually going to bed but I knew my brothers would still tell me when he got home. So I just changed into a comfier t-shirt and put on a thicker jacket, I think it used to be Soda's, I'm not too sure. I had nearly all of their old jackets, even one of Ponyboy's amazingly. Since as Steve only so kindly points out to me, I'm a twig with a chest, you can bet Soda hit him awfully hard over the head for saying that. And I'm telling you I'm slightly amazed he didn't do the same to Dally or Two-Bit because they laughed and agreed. Instead he called them perverted and threatened to tell Darry and they shut up funnily enough.

I pulled my blankets over me and began reading. It was a pretty rubbish story actually, but I had to read it for English so I thought I'd get it over and done with. Apparently it was even more boring than I first thought because I soon fell asleep fully clothed and all. I was a pretty light sleeper so when I heard yelling downstairs I immediately woke up. What on earth was going on? Rubbing my eyes I put the book on my bed just in time to hear one of them shout out to Ponyboy. Okay this was way weird.

"What happened?" I demanded tying up my hair loosely as I came downstairs.

They both turned and stared at me. Neither of them said anything. Darry's mouth was wide open…that was rather odd. And Sodapop looked in shock anyway; I think he was figuring out if I'd seen anything or not.

"Helloo what happened here?" I asked them again my hands on my hips, "And was that Ponyboy?"

"He…he erm," Soda began looking red and frustrated. "Ponyboy just ran out,"

I nodded slightly, "Why?"

"Did I really do that?" Darry said barely louder than a whisper and sat down on the couch, his head in his hands.

I raised my brows. What on earth was going on here? I looked between the two of them and Pony had run out. I slowly formed a guess and felt tears sting my eyes, my mouth open slightly.

"Oh you didn't did you?" I whispered.

Darry glanced up. "Yeah."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. As I opened them again I took another deep breath. Okay we had to act now. Get a plan…oh how could I be serious what the hell was going on!

"So he just ran then?"

"Yeah," Soda muttered staring at his feet.

"Look Pony's already pretty pissed with me, and I imagine he is with you too Darry, Soda you gotta find him," I demanded more than asked him.

Sodapop just stared at me. "What do you mean 'find him'?"

"He's out there on his own. If he does something stupid who knows what'll happen," I told him biting my lip nervously. "Someone has to find him."

"I think he should cool off," Sodapop told me rather than Darry who was just staring at the ground. "He might run off even if he sees me Pixie."

I looked devastated at the thought of him off on the streets alone but I really couldn't do much about it without totally proving to Ponyboy that I was acting like our mom. Sighing I sat down on the couch and Sodapop sat in between Darry and me.

I began to cry. I don't know why I just did. It was all just happening. What did any of us do to deserve this life? It wasn't fair. I wanted to voice those thoughts but Soda just put his arm around me and I curled up against him and cried myself to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

I felt someone move from underneath me and I groaned slightly. What the hell? I curled closer to the couch and I heard someone speak I groaned again in annoyance and put my hand over my eyes and someone laughed and said something. I moaned loudly and opened my eyes.

"Okay seriously I was sleeping there!" I snapped. What can I say? I'm not really a morning person.

Sodapop smiled slightly and I remembered why I was on the couch. "Sorry Pixie but we're going out to go look for Ponyboy,"

"Oh." I said simply seeing Two-Bit and Steve there with both my brothers. And I was asleep. Grr! "I'm coming," I said simply standing up, "Gimme a minute,"

"Pixie you sure," Darry begun.

"Yes." I snapped to him. "He's just as pissed with me as you, and if you're going so am I."

For once he didn't protest. I ran upstairs and pulled on my shoes, I had totally forgotten that I must have looked like a freak wearing one of my brothers' old jumpers and my hair was a mess but oh well. I came back downstairs and followed them out the door.

"Hey Pixie you know what it looks like you've just done?" Steve grinned at me.

I glanced up at him and saw Two-Bit snickering. "What?"

"Looks like you had a fun night," he grinned.

I watched Soda hit him over the head again and I glared at him. "Okay seriously you and the perve are in your own little perverted league now."

"Creeps," Soda said loudly putting his arm around me.

"Uh huh, perhaps you two and Jason ought to start a club," I suggested and Soda gave me a look. "What!"

"You reckon he'll be at Johnny's?" Darry asked before Soda could respond.

Soda snorted loudly. "He'll be with Johnny, but there? I doubt it,"

"Check the lot," Steve suggested.

We basically walked in silence all the way to the lot. Soda never left my side once. He was keeping something from me. Well that was my twin instinct at the very least. I'd ask him later perhaps. They weren't at the lot so Two-Bit put in that they could be at the park or even at Shepards, that we doubted but well I thought the park was pretty smart of Two-Bit to say, I mean I never would have thought of it myself.

As we got to the park we began walking towards to the playground area by the fountain. I personally didn't quite understand why he'd come here but well I suppose he didn't exactly want to come home and the lot was much too obvious to run away to.

"Hey do you see something?" Steve suddenly demanded.

I shaded my eyes from the sun and looked in the direction he was staring at, "Where?" then I saw a figure lying on the ground. "Is that a person?" I cried out.

My mind raced I was freaking out bad. As soon as I cried that out the guys all ran over. Well Darry was the first to start running but Two-Bit and Steve weren't very far behind. Sodapop glanced to me and then to them and started running. My mind was at a blank but I saw them all stopping and I suddenly started to run over. Inside my brain was a blur of thoughts and feelings.

"Pixie!" Sodapop shouted and turned around. "Pixie don't."

He grabbed me and just stopped me metres away. He blocked my sight completely, but then again he towered over me, which really isn't that hard. He stared me in the eyes and held my arms to my side.

"Soda move!" I cried out to him with irritation.

Darry came over to one side of Soda, he wasn't smiling, "Come on Pixie lets go home,"

"Darry!" I cried out my eyes getting wider. "What is it?" I demanded, this was just getting more annoying and when Two-Bit came over, minus the quirky smile and he reached for my hand I freaked out and pulled away. "Stop trying to protect me!" I snapped to them.

But then my eyes widened my whole body went into shock and I let out a scream. Soda clamped a hand over my mouth. My green eyes were wide and they were slowly filling with tears. I raised my own hand to my mouth and Soda removed his. I felt like I was going to throw up, I must have paled, I'm sure of it.

Lying in a heap was a boy. One of the soc's from last night. He was lying in a pool of blood. I was in someway relieved it wasn't someone I know but as I stared I felt myself get more upset and I felt like I was going to throw up.

"Pixie," Soda whispered putting his hand under my chin so I'd meet his eyes. "You shouldn't of."

I nodded and I felt the tears well over my eyes and I whispered. "He was one of the socs. Ponyboy was here," And then I began sobbing loudly and Soda pulled me towards him and hugged me, I closed my eyes, the tears sliding down my face I felt so sick. "I'm going to be sick." I whispered shakily.

"So am I." Soda muttered. He did look rather green. He'd never been one for blood.

I closed my eyes again. My head was pounding. I opened my eyes Darry was looking at me with total worry. I must have looked such a wreck. Oh god. This was doing nothing for my stomach.

"Let's get out of here, we can't be seen here," Darry told us.

We all started to walk away. Soda was still trying to hug me as I walked but I was stupid enough to glance back and that was it. I ran to the nearest group of trees and I threw up. I just wanted to collapse there. The feelings that were running through me were just so confusing, I felt so many things at once I'm amazed I had the strength to get up and walk the rest of the way home.

As soon as we got home I grabbed clean clothes and locked myself inside the bathroom. As soon as I stepped in the shower I started crying to myself. They wouldn't be able to hear me through the running of the water. Eventually the tears ran dry. I was crying over everything. My parents dying. Not protecting Ponyboy. Jason trying it on with me. Fighting with Pony. Him running away. That soc…dead. Everything. When the tears died I heard banging at the door and I stepped out of the shower.

"What?" I called out shakily.

"Pixie you alright?" Soda demanded.

"Y-yeah," I stammered.

"Promise you're not doing something stupid?"

I bit my lip to keep from crying and managed to whisper. "Promise."

I think he never left the door. I changed into a clean pair of jeans and I put on a violet t-shirt, my favorite colour. My hair was dripping wet. I slowly brushed it and it lay long down my back, my bangs sitting on my face. I cleaned my teeth straight after, my mouth just felt so gross. Throwing my dirty clothes in the basket and I opened the door and Soda was sitting right besides it.

As soon as the door opened he stood up and looked at me for reassurance, but over what I'm not too sure. That everything would be alright maybe. But if that's what he wanted I'm telling you it would have died after looking at me. I had this feeling that my eyes would never again hold that spark of hope, I think that had died once I saw that boy, because I couldn't see that when I looked in the mirror just minutes ago.

"Pixie are you okay?" he asked me.

I shook my head. "No I'm not. Are you?"

"No."

I gave him a sad smile. "Sodapop remind me never to not listen to you again." I whispered as I felt myself begin to cry again. "There's some things you never should see. That was one of them."

"Oh Pixie," Soda said softly as he began to hug me. "Pix promise me that you'll let me protect you and Ponyboy. You two can't keep seeing all this stuff. Or you're both going to crack."

"It's too late for that" I told him sadly walking away from him and down the stairs.

I could feel his eyes on me until I got downstairs. I think I'd rather my twin staring at me than what met me there. Dally was here, Steve and him were talking about Dal being hauled in this morning as it was a murder and they always think it's him. But everyone stopped whatever they were doing and stared at me. I don't understand why I had to be the person to stare at but I suppose it was more to do with the fact now Dallas knew my reaction they all thought I'd cracked. You know I think I have too.

"You okay kid?" Dally asked me.

I glared at him and sat on the couch. For once Two-Bit didn't try to grab me and pull me down. "I am not a kid Dallas." I told him angrily. "So don't call me one."

"No she ain't," Two-Bit put in, hmm I was curious to know what he was gonna say. "She's not a kid she's just plain old magical Pixiedust,"

I felt myself smile. That was what Two-Bit called me. No one else. When I'd read that Peter Pan book as a kid Two-Bit told me that I reminded him a bit of Tinkerbell, because she's surrounded by all those boys and she hates it when Wendy comes along and one of her boys begins to like her. He said I'd be like that when I'm older and he called me Pixiedust after Tinkerbell. No one knew the meaning but us and I refused anyone else to call me that.

"You remember why you called me that?" I asked him softly.

Two-Bit grinned, "Yeah I do."

"You were so right." I smiled.

I saw Dally, Steve and Darry share a confused look. They'd never understand so I'd never tell them. Besides it was just something between Two-Bit and I. And I wanted it to stay that way.

"Pixie, Ponyboy and Johnny were definitely involved," Darry told me grimly.

I closed my eyes slowly and opened them. "So they killed that boy?" I asked.

I must have looked distressed because Two-Bit reached for my hand and squeezed it. Weird but I didn't feel like freaking out again.

"Most likely," Darry said sighing. "They thought Dally did it."

I glanced to Dally, my eyes studying him. "You ass." I said shaking my head and smiling grimly. "You know."

"What are you talking about?" Dally said sneering.

I smirked. "You know I know and you're denying it. You know where they went Dallas don't bother lying, they might believe you but I won't, you know where my little brother and Johnny is." I said my eyes not moving from his face. "You can pretend you don't but you hid them somewhere Dallas Winston and I know it."

"Pixie shut up!" Darry cried out sounding irritated. "You don't know,"

"Don't tell me to shut up!" I cried out with irritation. "You saw that boy like I did Darry! They were involved, who else would you run to if you did that? Him."

Darry shook his head and the others to wouldn't meet my eyes. I knew Soda had entered the room, I mean I didn't know for sure but I could almost feel him there. Dally's eyes were on mine. They weren't giving me away any clues but I knew I was right, I don't know how I did but somewhere deep down I just knew I was right.

"Pixie just lay off it," Sodapop told me.

I turned around and looked at him. My face grim I walked past him and went upstairs to my room. Shutting my door angrily I sat on my bed and hugged my legs close to my chest and stared out my window.

I had really seen way too much way too soon. It was just so much easier when my parents where around. When I turned thirteen and I got my period my mother was the first I turned to. We squealed excitedly over my womanhood, she was so proud. I'd told Sodapop but he never quite understood our joy but he was happy for me, but it just wasn't the same. My mother and I could talk about boys and I'd tell her about who I liked, it was wonderful. Dad and I would talk about school. He really understood my dreams; he was just there for me. He couldn't talk girl things but my dad really cared about me, when I came home crying about my first boyfriend breaking up with me he comforted me instead of mom.

When my parents died I had two huge voids in my life. Sodapop tried to fill moms void and told me I could talk girlie with him and he'd be all girlie with me. But it would never work. I knew that before I even tried, he'd never understand, he wouldn't want to know who I liked, well not in the way mom did. She always wanted to know why and would gush with me. Darry tried to be like dad but that failed. He could never talk to me like dad. He would just be Darry talking to me, not daddy. Then I had Jason.

I fell back on him a lot during those first few months. I really relied on him. You know I even believed I loved him. I told him that. Then he tried it with me. I refused. I realized what he was like. He only comforted me because he wanted one thing, and that wasn't me. He just wanted sex. I cried so much when I realized that. I'd lost three things. My parents and the guy I thought I loved. That boy's body today showed something to me, life is too short. I wish I'd realized that long ago instead of wasting all this time trying to figure out life without my parents, just life altogether.

As I stare out the window I see Johnny's house. His parents were so evil. They hurt him so bad. They didn't deserve life. I can see every house on our street. Everyone's house has a story to tell. Every family is different. But we're all here just struggling to live our lives and get somewhere in life. I wiped a tear from my face. I didn't want to live here. My parents and Darry have done everything for all of us just to live. I could grow up here. I have grown up here. But I've seen too much. If I ever get married and have kids I don't want them growing up here. Because I don't want anyone to ever have to see the things I've seen in the past year, what I saw this morning. I only wish I could have protected Ponyboy. That's my only wish.


	7. Chapter 7

The sun had long disappeared as I stared out of the window. I bit my lip and my stomach growled again. It had been growling at me to feed it for the past few hours but I'd refused to go downstairs yet. I hadn't eaten in over a day and I felt ill because of it.

But I knew Ponyboy wouldn't have wanted me to starve myself. In fact I imagine if he knew exactly what I was doing he'd probably be dragging me downstairs and force feeding me. You know, it probably was possible now. I smirked. It actually was. My little Ponyboy is growing up, and well isn't exactly little anymore, or a boy really.

Sighing to myself I finally gave in to my stomach, besides starving myself was plain stupid. I didn't care if they all stared at me I had picked up a colorful vocabulary over the years, I never used it but it didn't mean I couldn't use it. I just needed the perfect moment, even if my brothers and my friends could become the targets.

Slowly creeping down the stairs I walked into the lounge and they all glanced up at me. By all I mean my two brothers and Steve. Who knew or cared where Dallas had gone, and well like Two-Bit wouldn't not go out on a Saturday night. Some things would never change.

Darry opened his mouth to say something but I walked straight past them all and into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich. They were all talking quietly and I'm going to swing a guess that it was about me or Pony. I'd say me though, not to sound too self occupied but that was just the most likely.

I took a bite of my sandwich when Darry finally came in. I refused to meet his eye at first but when he sat across from me at the table I unfortunately kind of had to meet his eye, since staring at a sandwich was just a little boring.

"You're hungry at this time of the night?" Darry asked me curiously.

I glanced at the clock. Woah it was almost ten. I'd been up there for quite a bit longer than I had actually thought. I looked back at him and nodded.

"I haven't eaten anything since dinner yesterday Dar," I told him with a slight smile. "I don't like starving myself, its really painful you know."

"Please tell me you're kidding." Darry said staring at me with slight anger.

I forced a bit of a smile. "Um sorry I'm not,"

"Pixie," he moaned.

I giggled slightly. "I just didn't well, remember."

"Pixie," he said again, but Darry was grinning slightly as he shook his head. "You're really one of a kind."

"No I'm not!" I protested loudly as he stood up. He turned and looked at me. "Soda's the same as me!"

"Yeah but he'd never not eat," Darry laughed.

I laughed too. "Oh so true."

He just smiled at me. I smiled back then looked to my sandwich and then to him.

"Unless you wish to see me eat then go away I'm hungry," I told him with a grin. I'm amazed I managed to smile you know considering every possible bad thought about my little brother had been running through my mind the whole day. "Scoot!"

It didn't take me long to polish off the sandwich. Cleaning up my plate I wandered back into the lounge and squished myself inbetween Soda and Steve. Steve grunted in annoyance and Soda gave me a sad smile and put his arm around me, pulling me closer to him.

I think he'd been thinking the same things as me the whole day. And he knew it. I hated my thoughts, I felt bad for thinking them but then I'd feel worse at the thought it could actually be happening. And Soda would understand the best since I was sure he was thinking and feeling the same things. It's funny how alike we are when it comes to those things. And scary too to know someone else has to feel those awful feelings along with you.

"Pixie are you okay?" Steve asked me.

He broke the nervous and worried tension in the room. The TV was on but no one was watching it. The three of us were staring at it but we weren't watching it. Darry was trying to read his newspaper but I have a feeling he hadn't taken in a word. As I stared at the TV and as the pictures changed my thoughts were on my younger brother and I was crying. I'm guessing Steve saw. Well I wasn't exactly hiding them so I imagine it wouldn't have been that hard.

"N-no," I stammered. "And I'm not going to be until P-Ponyboy comes b-back."

I heard Soda begin to cry. I was a bit shocked. Last time he cried was when our parents died. That was weird enough. Then I had guessed I'd never ever see him cry again. But if he really did feel like how I felt it was about the only thing I knew I could do without screaming out in pain that my little brother was missing. Crying actually helped with something.

"Aw don't you two cry," Steve muttered from next to me.

I began sobbing into my hands. I felt like it was all my fault. I mean it was. If I hadn't fought with Ponyboy he never would have gone off with Johnny and he would have come home before curfew and him and Darry never would have fought with him and my little Ponyboy would be home with me now, laughing or something. Not missing. I began sobbing even louder. I really began to hate myself.

"This is all my fault," I finally wailed standing up.

"Pixie," I heard Darry sigh. Looking at me his eyes looked so sad and lost. "No it's not, its mine."

"Its mine if I hadn't fought with him he never would have come home late and then you never would have," I was totally rambling on and I was sobbing hard, I barely understood what I was saying.

I just left the room. Shaking I slowly walked up the stairs to my room. I didn't bother to close my door as I threw myself down on my bed. My tears soon dried up as I laid there taking shallow breaths. Each one as if it was my last. I stared at the stars until I felt my eyes begin to blur. I wished on each star for my Pony to come back. I lost count at how many wishes I had made after fourteen and I slowly drifted into a restful sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

When I woke up on Sunday morning I had actually forgot about what had happened in the past two days. I got up and began to walk over to Soda and Pony's room to crawl into bed with them, like I did every Sunday morning then it dawned on me what had happened.

Frozen in the hall I bit my lip. I instead went into the bathroom and immediately went into the shower. I stood there dumbfounded for I don't know how long when I finally decided that instead of just standing there making myself miserable with my thoughts just to get out of there and go get changed.

Wrapping a towel around me I slowly walked back into my room and locked my door. I don't know why but today I felt like wearing a skirt. I'm a bit sorry to say this skirt was well greaser girl short. I didn't think I looked bad in it though. I mean I liked the skirt but unfortunately it well was a skirt that makes guys think you really are a greaser girl.

Tying my wet hair up high and pulling on a t-shirt I unlocked my door and slowly made my way down the stairs. To be honest I wasn't really awake yet. My eyes were drooping shut and like most Sunday mornings I made a lot of noise coming downstairs. Darry often said it was dangerous as more than once I've actually kind of forgotten to step…yes I know its stupid but well I was never awake when it happened. Yet again today was no different.

"Jesus Christ Pixie Curtis would you shut up!" Two-Bit snapped.

I was sitting on my butt on the ground after pretty much forgetting to step. Most people would ask if you were alright but no not him. He had to tell me to shut up. I could see through to the lounge where I think he was sleeping off a hangover. This really annoyed me.

"No I wont," I snapped back slowly standing up, my legs hurt…falling down stairs really does hurt you know. "It's my house and it's almost ten o'clock,"

"I don't care," he grumbled rubbing his eyes.

I glared at him and marched into the lounge. "And it's hardly my fault that whilst all of us were home last night worrying about Ponyboy and Johnny you decide to go get yourself drunk. That's your own damn fault so go sleep it off at your own house."

"What's up your ass today?" Two-Bit said pulling a face. "Ain't I allowed to drink?"

"I don't give a shit whether you drink or not Matthews but in case you haven't noticed my baby brother is missing!" I cried out with annoyance.

Two-Bit rolled his eyes. "Yeah doesn't mean you should go about waking up people, Jesus Christ Pixie its plain rude." Then he looked at me closely. "Why the hell are you dressed like such a slut?"

"You can't talk about rude!" I began then I realized what he said and my mouth gaped open. "Excuse me? Did you just call me a slut?"

"Perhaps, you look like one," he replied smirking.

"So it's alright to call me a slut when you probably were with a real one last night, I bet you didn't call that bimbo a slut," I spat out.

"No I didn't, 'cause she's not one. Unlike you, I bet you gave it to Jason just like he asked,"

"You -" but before I could finish someone grabbed me and clamped a hand over my mouth.

"Two-Bit you know she's not a slut," I heard Sodapop say angrily from behind me, so he was the one with a hand over my mouth. Oops and to think I was considering biting the person… "Would you two stop bickering for once and say sorry to each other? You're like a pair of three year olds."

I pushed Sodapop away from me and walked into the kitchen and I heard Two-Bit cuss me. I rolled my eyes and sat down at the kitchen table. I closed my eyes and rested my head on the table putting my hands over the back of my head.

"You two really are like an old married couple," Sodapop announced scraping the chair along the lino. Ugh I hated that noise and he knew it. Evil. "You need counseling."

I sat upright and glared at him. "We are not like an old married couple! People who marry love each together!" I cried out. "And him! You heard what he said!"

Sodapop just smirked at me and said nothing. I sighed loudly why must every guy I know see the pure joy in either annoying the hell out of me or watching me freak out? Honestly it's at times like this I really, _really_ want mom back. She'd have stuck up for me.

"Is it ever quiet in here in the damn morning?" Darry grumbled walking over to the coffeepot.

"'Fraid not brother dear," I told him crossing my arms across my chest. "It's the way of Curtis life,"

"You know we really need to lock you in your room at night," Darry told us a smile playing on his lips.

I stared at him. "Why?"

"Because you're a danger to yourself,"

"I am not!" I protested whilst my twin laughed at me. "How?"

"Erm lets see," Sodapop said thoughtfully, "You just fell down the stairs!" he laughed.

I had to smile. "That is not my fault."

"Whose fault then?" Sodapop asked curiously.

"My feet's," I grinned.

Darry shook his head and muttered something like 'She truly is one of a kind' before disappearing into the lounge to find his paper. Now that is a weird habit. Not even our dad did that! Sodapop had stopped laughing at me and discovered the cake, which he was now devouring. It does nothing for your stomach let me guarantee you watching him eat that.

Pulling a face I started to stand up and go into the lounge room when I realized that _he_ was there. And I refused to be in the same room as him, breathing the same air as him until he apologized first. Because I did not totally insult him. He insulted me so therefore he should apologize first. Sighing slightly I sat back down and put my head on the table closing my eyes, at least this way I didn't have to see Soda eat it. But ew, I could hear him. Honestly I swear mom and dad skipped out on teaching them manners sometimes!

"Hey Pixie," Sodapop suddenly said swallowing the cake in his mouth; well I sure hope he did. Cos of it was still in there I think I'm going to throw up! "Pixie?"

"Yeah?" I asked lifting my head up cautiously. Phew the cake was all gone…in what two minutes!

"Do you really think Dallas knows?" he asked in a low voice.

I nodded and bit my lip. "Oh Sodapop he has to know," I told him staring my twin in the eye. "I mean Soda who would you go to if you killed someone? I mean you'd hardly come to any of us,"

"I know," Soda said sighing slightly. "So you think they really killed that soc?"

I shrugged slightly and heard myself sigh. "I don't believe either could for fun. Soda they must've been jumped." I said feeling the pit of my gut feel heavier all of a sudden. "If they didn't they'd have been back. Pony wouldn't just leave us, he's not like that."

"I guess,"

"Look Dallas knows," I said quietly. "I'm still deciding whether or not that's a good thing but whatever way he knows where Ponyboy and Johnnycake is Soda. We just need to break him," I said my eyes flashing with worry.

Sodapop nodded slightly. "Yeah well Pixie he might not,"

"Soda!" I said my mouth open slightly. "You don't think he knows?"

"I don't know," Soda told me. "But it doesn't mean I'm just gonna believe what you do," My mouth dropped open even more and Sodapop continued. "I mean I know someone knows, but he might not know as much as you think Pixie, so just lay off him,"

"But he knows!" I protested feeling my voice get a little louder.

Sodapop nodded. "Yeah something, what we don't know. Just don't go messing with him Pix,"

"Why?" I demanded getting a bit annoyed with him. Sodapop was the most likely of my brothers to get me listening to him but this was a lot more serious than whose making dinner or washing the dishes. "He knows where our little brother is! Ponyboy is missing!"

"Stop freaking out," Sodapop said sounding irritatingly calm. "I'm worried too but I don't want you getting yourself involved in this, let me deal with it."

"It's not up to you," I hissed, my eyes narrowed.

Sodapop just looked at me grimly, "I don't care. I'm telling you not to get involved, please Pixie just listen, I don't need this," he practically begged me. "I don't want to lose you as well."

My hardened expression dropped and I looked at him with worry. "Sodapop we're not going to lose Ponyboy like mom and dad, don't worry."

"I didn't mean that," he said avoiding my eyes and standing up.

"What?" I asked worriedly and curiously at the same time. "Soda what's happened?" I asked him reaching for his hand before he could leave me alone in here.

Soda didn't want to face me in the eye but I had his hand and he wouldn't get rough with me and tug away, well I didn't think so at least. Not now since this wasn't fun and games.

"It doesn't matter okay?" Sodapop said slipping his hand out of mine. "Just worry about Ponyboy okay Pixie? You just do that,"

I watched Sodapop walk away. I considered walking after him but I figured that if he was desperate for me to know he wouldn't have exactly walked away from me now would he? I sighed slightly perhaps this was what he was talking with Darry about on Friday night when I'd come home from the movies. God Friday seemed like years ago…I closed my eyes and suddenly began to pray in my head.

I wanted Ponyboy and Johnny to be safe, to be fine. For Dally to tell us. For Soda to stop being miserable as it was so unlike him. Even for me and Two-Bit to stop bickering. I just wanted everything to be alright again. I'd never complain about how boring my life was if I could just go back to Friday. If only I could.


	9. Chapter 9

It was now about three or four in the afternoon and I'll have you know Two-Bit and I were at last on speaking terms, mainly due to me. As there was only so long I could spend in the kitchen doing absolutely nothing other than watch all of them eat, which is ever so slightly disgusting. And there was nothing in my bedroom other than homework, and the only place with entertainment Two-Bit had stolen. So I had no choice in doing something about that.

Once we were on even terms I found one of Ponyboy's books and begun reading. I'm not sure why I was able to even do this but I'll have you know I was not prepared to complain one bit as I was at least able to escape from my worry for a couple of hours at least.

"Hey Pixiedust?" Two-Bit said suddenly glancing up from the floor where he was sprawled watching Mickey Mouse.

"Ya?" I asked not glancing up from my book.

"You going to school tomorrow?"

I shrugged. "Don't think so,"

"Want me to get your homework for you?"

I put my book down and smiled at him. "You'd go to class just to get my homework Two-Bit?"

"Oh I dunno," Two-Bit said looking slightly scared. "I just meant go to the office or somethin'."

I smiled at him. "You're so sweet when you want to be," then I opened my book again. "If you could that'd be great, thanks."

"'Kay," Two-Bit said going back to his beloved cartoons.

"Wait," Darry said suddenly. "Did I hear right, you, Pixie Elizabeth Curtis is actually planning to miss school?"

"Oh," I said pulling a face looking to him, "Do I have to go? It's just well that soc was popular I didn't really feel like getting messed up in this anymore than I have to."

I saw Sodapop give me a smile. I hadn't proceeded to question what he'd lost but I'd at least make him happy and not get involved.

"Oh no it's fine, I wasn't going to let you go anyway," Darry admitted.

I raised a brow. A helpful thing I learnt from good ol' Two-Bit. "Oh really?"

"I didn't want you mixing with them either," Darry said. "I'm sure they'd have figured out you're related, they're hardly keeping this quiet you know."

"They aren't?" I asked closing my book again.

Darry lifted up his paper and even from across the room I could read the bold headline that the boy's name was Robert Sheldon and then in brief I saw both my brother's and Johnny's names mentioned. I sighed slightly and shook my head.

I opened my book again and tried to concentrate on reading Ponyboy's book. He told me it was a good one and I decided to read it. And somehow it brought me comfort in knowing that my little brother had once read over those words was the only reason I was able to continue with it.

Our front door then shut loudly and I heard loud footsteps enter our lounge room and someone lifted up my feet from the end of the couch and it sunk slightly as someone sat down and put my feet on their lap.

"Hey y'all, got any news?" Steve asked us all.

I starred at him slightly. "Normally you sit on my feet. Did you take something?"

"Would you rather I do that?" he asked grinning slightly.

"No." I said instantly, my eyes widening. "I'm quite happy like this," I said going back to my book. Someone else could answer.

"None at all," My twin sighed. "Only what's given out in there is what we know," He said pointing to the newspaper.

"The fuzz haven't even come around?"

"Nope," Sodapop said sounding like he had kinda sighed. "Guess they don't think they're too important other than the fact they wanna catch 'em."

"Yeah well they all side with the soc's." Steve just said simply.

I wanted to protest and say that wasn't always true but the more I thought about it it really was the truth. I'd never really thought about it before. When my parents died they never really cared about us losing our parents, being alone, splitting us up. They didn't care at all. No matter how hard we try I have a feeling they'll never give us that break we need. I hate socs and the fuzz. I really do. They made me lose my little brother. I hate them.

'Stay home Pixie. Just in case Ponyboy calls,' those words were echoing in my head throughout the whole day. I'd been told not to leave home alone. In case the socs got the idea to jump me or do something dangerous. Besides Darry was still determined to believe Pony'd call.

I didn't think he would though. Don't get me wrong I clinged desperately to the hope this was all still a dream and we'd go back to Friday with me doing my homework and Pony would call me so we could walk home from the movies together. But reality did set in around me as soon as Two-Bit gave me my homework with a sad smile before going back to the TV.

Because if this wasn't all real I'd have gone to school today. Because Pixie Elizabeth Curtis never misses school. Well at least not the one with her little brother.

Sighing slightly I glanced to all of my homework. It wasn't that much actually, very little to what I normally had to do, but that didn't bother me in the least. I considered doing it now, you know stick to normality for my sake before I really cracked more than I already had but the whole day I'd been bored out of my brain, I'd save it for tomorrow. And yes I would be _that_ bored.

"Am I in the right house?" Sodapop announced loudly coming into the lounge room Steve in tow.

I glanced up. "No Sodapop you're really in Florida right now and we're really the Evans',"

Sodapop paled slightly but it soon disappeared and the happy-go-lucky grin appeared again, "I meant the fact my sister, my twin, Pixie, isn't doing her homework?" he announced feigning shock. "Why so?"

"Well then I won't be bored tomorrow," I answered as if it was plain obvious. "I cleaned the kitchen three times today Soda. I was bored out of my brains."

Steve smirked. "Only you would make a day off school like school."

"Shut up." I said with a slight smile.

"I suggest you all shut up," Two-Bit said loudly his eyes not leaving the TV.

"I suggest you get a life," I retorted throwing a pillow at his head.

"Oh really?" Two-Bit demanded turning around.

"Yeah," I said crossing my arms and glaring at him. "Is that all you think about Matthews? That stupid mouse?"

"I think about other things!" Two-Bit cried indignantly with a cocky grin. "Would you like to know what those things are then Curtis?"

"I'd love to know," I said looking at him with genuine interest.

"Well I think about you for starters," Two-Bit grinned cheekily whilst Sodapop shoved him on the floor.

"How so?" I asked smirking slightly.

"Well," he began when I saw Sodapop glare at him.

"Aw c'mon Sodapop I wanna know!" I moaned seeing Two-Bit stop.

Soda stared at me. "But he's being dirty!"

"The more proof that he's really perverted," I laughed standing up, "I'm only kidding Sodapop!" I giggled seeing his face, "And don't you dare tell me or think those things Matthews or I'll kill you!" Then I paused with a smile. "Well Darry might at least,"

Sodapop and Steve began laughing since it was rather true but Two-Bit didn't see the amusement.

"What might I do?" Darry asked loudly appearing behind me.

I jumped slightly and looked at him. "I'm sure Sodapop will tell you,"

"I'm sure Steve will," Soda said suddenly.

"Nah I'm sure Two-Bit would be delighted too," Steve said looking freaked at the thought.

I stifled a giggle at Darry's confused face and Two-Bit's fear. Oh this was priceless!

"What am I being told?"

"Two-Bit's having dirty thoughts," I said loudly flashing a grin at him. "About yours truly. Thought you might kill him,"

"What?" Darry cried out.

Sodapop smirked, "It doesn't matter Dar she's being an idiot, its all lies."

"Or is it?" Dallas announced showing up in our lounge room sharing a look with Two-Bit. "The truths always good ain't it?"

"Dal," I faintly heard Two-Bit moan.

"Like you can talk," I spat out. I couldn't help myself. "You know where they are and you're lying. Hypocrite."

"Pixie!" my two brothers moaned in annoyance.

I didn't say anything else even though I clearly wanted to and I think Dallas knew that but I crossed my arms across my chest and stared at Dallas with annoyance hoping to break him. But clearly I wasn't going to break him as he looked like he was containing laughter at what I'd said.

"So did anything happen at school then Two-Bit? Steve?" Darry finally asked breaking the tension in the room.

Two-Bit nodded. "You bet those socs are gonna want revenge,"

"Everything was divided," Steve put in and then paused, "Well it was before but even the teachers are noticing more so now, we're all gonna have to stick together,"

"And Pixie is not going to school." Sodapop said loudly.

I rolled my eyes. "I'll do as I please,"

"And get jumped?" Dally sneered. "Are you really that stupid Pixie?"

I opened my mouth to say something but there was a knock at our front door and I froze. Nobody ever knocks at the door in our neighborhood. You just walk straight in the house. The number of times I'd woken up to find Dallas or even Tim Shepard sleeping on our couch was petty normal to me. Only two people knocked at our door. The fuzz and social workers. Oh god. Either way this was not good.


	10. Chapter 10

Darry was the only one to come to his sense in time to go answer the door. I was too in shock. I sat back down on the couch with Sodapop on one side and Two-Bit got off the floor and sat on the other side wedging me in between them. Dally knew his place wouldn't be here if it was the fuzz and took off through the kitchen door and Steve sat in our moms chair and turned the TV off.

I could faintly hear my big brother talking to whoever it was. I was nervously clasping my hands together and Sodapop threw an arm around my shoulder and Darry eventually appeared back in the lounge room with two cops and a lady, the social worker, I just knew it. Oh god. My stomach was tossing and turning, two of the things I hated most in the one room, I felt sick to my stomach.

"They just want to ask us some questions about what happened on Friday night," Darry informed us looking pretty serious.

I wasn't paying that much attention to what they were asking us, I mean I was but they weren't completely making sense in my mind. I answered all that I could be a help with but my brothers and Two-Bit mainly answered for me since they were the ones that were with me pretty much the whole of Friday night. The social worker was asking Darry something and he nodded and looked at me. Blinking I stared at him and the social worker gave me a soft smile. Oh I think I'm meant to go talk to her.

"Would you like to talk in the kitchen dear?" she asked me.

I stared at her slightly and nodded. "Um okay, can't we talk out here?"

"No it'd be best not to," she said walking into our kitchen like she owned the place.

I raised my brows at that and Sodapop shrugged at me. But knowing Darry would be mad if I wasn't at least nice to the woman I followed her and gave her a bit of a sigh before closing the kitchen door and sitting down at our table.

"What would you like to talk about then?" I asked her as nicely as I could muster.

The woman gave me a bit of a smile. "It's about your brother being your guardian, ah, Pixie is it?"

"Its Pixie," I answered without thinking but my blood went cold when she mentioned Darry being my guardian. Nothing good would come of this I knew. "What about Darry being my guardian miss?"

"Darrel is the guardian to three of you and what with Ponyboy missing when he comes back you'll all clearly have to go to court," The woman informed me, her eyes staying the same. Cold. "Even if your brother doesn't return Pixie I'm afraid we'll most definitely have to rethink you staying with your brothers as we're not sure it'll be right for you to stay with them anymore after what's happened."

"You're kidding me?" I cried out feeling my eyes prick with tears. "You have to be! You can't separate us!"

The woman clucked her tongue. "I'm afraid dear that that choice lies with a judge in court, we're only thinking what's best for you and that might lie in adoption, or a girls home dear."

"That is not the best for me," I said trying to swallow back my tears but I knew it failed because my vision was blurring slightly and my cheeks felt a little damp. "What's best for me is to stay with my brothers, you can't do that."

"I'm sorry dear but that's not for me to decide, won't you like to go to a good school? Wear, erm," she said sniffing slightly. "Good clothes?"

I shook my head and scraped my chair back. "That's not important to me! You can't do this!"

"I'm afraid we can, and we probably will," The woman said snippily getting annoyed with me, her eyes even colder than before.

I could feel the tears run down my cheeks and held back a sob. "I won't go,"

"But -" she began.

But I wouldn't hear any of it. I threw open the kitchen door and I felt all eyes on me as I stormed past them all and up the stairs for my room. I heard Darry call out for me to stay down here but I flat out ignored him and went into my room shutting my door as loudly as I could muster, which well wasn't actually that loud, and I sat on my bed and cried to myself.

They couldn't make me go away! Or could they? I know when Dar got the guardianship over the three of us they were all very wary but we'd been good together! I was still in school and getting good grades they couldn't do this to us! They couldn't do this to me! I hate to sound like a whiner but I couldn't leave my brothers, the gang. My family. I couldn't leave any of them, this wasn't right and this wasn't fair. And you can damn bet I would not go down without a fight.

I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and got off of my bed. I had a tiny mirror hanging on my wall next to my bed and I peered in it. Just like I expected I cry for a couple of minutes and my eyes go puffy and red. And there was no way of denying I was crying though since they'd all seen me cry downstairs just before. Sniffing slightly I took a deep breath and opened my door. I couldn't hear that stupid woman anymore or the two cops so I presumed they'd gone, walking back in my room to look out my window I saw the cop car was gone and so would they be gone.

Sighing slightly I knew it was my turn to make dinner and I also knew there would be no way of getting out of it unless I was totally bedridden and even then I'm sure Darry would drag me downstairs to cook. Walking back out of my room I slowly walked down the hall and I could hear them all talking, and no it actually wasn't about me, it was about the fuzz finally deciding to care. I had to laugh, they didn't care about us, they just cared about getting Ponyboy and Johnny locked up because they just liked to see us put through pain. They really were evil. There was no doubt about that.

"Hey Pixie," Sodapop began as soon as I'd descended the stairs and walked a step into the lounge.

I looked up at him, my eyes were red and puffy, actually I have no proof of this but I'm sure they were anyway. "Sodapop do not start on me unless you have a death wish."

Soda just glared at me. "Aren't I allowed to ask how my sister is?"

"No you're not," I said simply with a little shrug. "I am not in the mood Sodapop Curtis do not bug me right now. It's quite simple Soda, doesn't need instructions or nothin'."

Sodapop looked really annoyed with me now and I'm sorry to say I didn't even feel one bit guilty. Darry gave a look to tell me he would not deal with that attitude right now but I just glared back at him. Two-Bit stared at me weirdly, since well he was the only one I'd ever really snap at without a full-blown fight coming after it. Steve just rolled his eyes, I think he was the one most used to my little outbursts of frustrations since my brothers usually didn't pay attention to them and the other guys who normally were the source of my frustration didn't think much of them. Boys.

I walked straight past the four of them and into the kitchen. I opened our cupboards debating what exactly I should cook. I didn't even want to cook tonight, well I never wanted to cook any Monday or Thursday night but tonight I just did not feel like it in the least. I bit my lip and scanned the cupboard for something easy. Sighing after giving up the hope of making something easy I closed that cupboard and glanced outside.

I knew then that I just didn't want to be home. I needed to go out, anywhere, I didn't care I just needed some fresh air to breathe, to think. Just get me some space! I was choking in this atmosphere of angry feelings, sadness; the emotions were too much for me when I had my own to deal with. Staring as the sun began to fade I picked up Sodapop's jacket which was slung over a chair and slipped it on, it'd be a lot warmer than a lot of mine, that is if I made it outside dodging questions which I didn't want to really answer.

"I'm going out," I said suddenly walking into the lounge room straight to our tiny front hall to open the door when Darry had finally comprehended just what I said and Sodapop realized it was his jacket.

"You're not going out alone!" Darry said loudly and I heard him stand up. "Pixie you heard what they said they're looking for revenge."

I sighed loudly and turned around a bit, "I'll be fine, I won't just roam the streets, look I just want to go out a bit, be _alone_," I said trying to put a point on 'alone'.

"Just call us to get us if it gets too late," Darry said looking me in the eye silently telling me that if anything happened I would die. "Got it?"

"Got it," I said turning out the door when Sodapop cried out. "Why are you wearing my jacket?"

I giggled slightly and continued down the street ignoring him completely. Oh well I'd borrowed it before, I mean if he _really_ wanted me to get cold then I'd give it back, but I'm _sure_ Sodapop wouldn't wish that on his favorite sister now would he?

I folded my arms across my chest and looked around the lot. I kept walking past it, the lot was very creepy during the day, well that's what I thought, since it was well the biggest open space near our house, the park being the next and it was just soo…empty. I had been walking around for about ten or fifteen minutes not too sure where I was going when I realized the direction I was going.


	11. Chapter 11

At first I thought I was going back to the park. Back to where I thought it had all happened. I swallowed back my tears then but then it hit me just exactly where I was going. I was going to Two-Bit's house. Why go to his house I began thinking. I mean he wasn't there and I wanted to breathe but I didn't need to breathe, I needed to be around females.

My mom had been gone so long now, I needed to talk to someone other than my brothers or the guys, I had pretty much no girlfriends, and you know the closet thing to that I had when my mother was alive was her. But in truth I had someone else, someone I had never realized who either.

I smiled softly to myself. I wondered how Emily was going, ever since Ponyboy got moved up a year in school we basically never saw very much of little Emily Matthews. I used to babysit her with Two-Bit when she was a bit younger. Only it ended up the two of us babysitting him by the end of the day! I laughed to myself. Emily was younger than me but she was the closest person to me after my mother and I'd never realized it.

I shook my head and sighed. She probably wouldn't even really want to talk to me. I mean none of us had seen much of Two-Bit's sister recently, Two-Bit never really mentioned her, I wondered if she'd changed, or perhaps she missed us. I missed her. But why did it have to be something like this to make me realize this! Gosh I wish I wasn't so slow at all this, maybe if I'd realized this sooner things might've been a little bit better.

Soon I ended up outside the Matthews' house. I sighed to myself and looked up to the door. Better late than never I suppose. Taking a few slow steps to their front door I knocked on it and I heard a loud noise, as if a chair had come crashing down and pounding footsteps running to the door when it was thrown open.

I felt my mouth drop open slightly when I saw the girl standing in the doorway. Little Emily had grown up to say the least! It'd only been a year! Probably less! I laughed silently to myself, she even looked a lot more like Two-Bit now she was a bit older, but well they were related after all.

She amazingly was almost my height despite our ages and as soon as she recognized me you can bet her mouth dropped open and her blue eyes widened and she then let out a toothy grin before throwing her arms around me and hugging me tightly before squealing excitedly.

"Pixie!" Emily cried out happily stepping back slightly. "I haven't seen you in ages! Have you been busy?" She then demanded and I felt a bit guilty that I hadn't come sooner. "I have too," She said before I could answer and that made me feel slightly better. "How is everyone? I've missed seeing you all but life's been just so hectic you know," Emily was rambling on.

I laughed at her. "Gosh Em you still talk a lot don't you!"

Emily giggled and looked a bit pink before flashing me a smile. "What can I say it's definitely a Matthews' trait!" Emily laughed opening the door wider, "Oh Pixie come in, we have to talk! I imagine there's so much to talk about!"

"Mmm," I murmured with a smile stepping inside their house. "You heard about Pony and Johnnycakes?"

Emily nodded slightly and looked slightly bitter over it. "It's disgusting isn't it? I mean those two wouldn't touch no one and someone goes after the two that you know aren't like the others, like Tim Shepard or well you know Dally," Emily told me looking a bit pink saying Dally. "This is only from what I've heard," she said hurriedly as if to defend herself.

I raised my brows. "No it's pretty true Emily, don't freak or nothing now,"

Emily blushed slightly and shut the door behind me. I followed her into their lounge room and Emily flopped onto the couch so I sat next to her and gave her a sad smile and Emily nodded slightly and sighed.

"Been too long hasn't it?" Emily whispered pushing her hair out of her eyes. "Too much has changed too soon. It always happens to us doesn't it?"

By us I'm guessing she meant us as in all the greasers and I had to nod. Emily sighed again and I could see her eyes were tearful and she looked really angry and sad at the same time. I had a feeling then this girl talk wasn't going to be about me after all.

"Em what do you mean?" I asked her reaching for her hand.

Emily smiled at me almost gratefully. "Those socs, the ones that jumped Ponyboy and Johnny they called things out to me last week, it was so embarrassing," She told me her blue eyes looking tearful. "But I'm not like greaser girls! I've never even had my first kiss! Why can they get away with those sorts of things? It's not fair, it's not nice."

"I know," I whispered squeezing Emily's hand. "I know it's not but we have to be tough and ignore it all, it doesn't matter as long as who count knows it not true. I know it's not true, our gang knows it's not true, your brother and your mom knows it's not true." I told her reaching my other hand up to wipe up her tears. "Emily the socs will get what they deserve one day, don't worry about that."

Emily nodded and sniffed slightly. "I don't want revenge Pixie, it's just I don't like being told I'm like that. I was so embarrassed."

"Em don't worry," I whispered feeling my own eyes fill with tears. "Oh gosh you've got me crying," I said laughing slightly fanning myself with my hand. "Gosh Emily!"

Emily giggled slightly and smiled wiping her own eyes with the back of her hand. "Oh Pixie thanks."

"No thank you," I grinned swallowing back my own tears and smiling at her. "Oh Emily it's really been too long since we've had girl talk hasn't it? When was the last time you saw the gang hon?" I demanded. "You still belong even if you luckily aren't stuck with Ponyboy any more."

Emily laughed at me. "Nice sister you are!"

"Just don't tell him," I giggled.

Emily smirked. "Sure. And it has been too long. Ohh Pixie you're almost seventeen!"

"I know, I'm getting old," I said with a wry smile. "So are you little Miss Fourteen."

"I know!" Emily moaned pulling a face. "I'll be all old and wrinkly like you soon!"

"Thanks!" I cried out swatting her.

"Well it's true," Emily giggled poking her tongue out at me. "Anyway moldy oldie what brings you 'round anyway? Not that I'm complaining, I was all on my lonesome anyway." Emily said pulling a face.

"Aw," I said pulling a face with her and she laughed and hit me.

"Don't mock me!"

I giggled at her. "Okay." Emily gave me a smile and shook her head I just grinned. "Anyway why I'm here?" I asked her and she nodded at me. "I dunno. I just wanted to get out, get away from the guys," I told Emily rolling my eyes. "Too much is going on you know? Just need some me time, now it looks like girl time."

Emily laughed. "True."

Smiling at Emily I yawned slightly and stretched out my legs. Seeing me yawn Emily then yawned and giggled slightly, I don't know what was funny but it set me off too. We started laughing over the stupidest things too. A song on the radio, the chair, the one which had indeed fallen over, lying there on the ground, even just at each other. It was the best fun I can tell you I have had in quite awhile.

"Pixie," Emily coughed out still giggling. "Pix won't your brothers be worried?" she asked me taking a deep breath and wiping her eyes.

I stopped laughing suddenly and froze. "Oh my god I kinda forgot about that," I said feeling my face burn. "I am so dead."

"What if you stay the night?" Emily suggested looking up to a clock on the wall. "I mean it's about eight now, its not that late and all to go home but you know if you want you can stay," Emily offered looking a bit embarrassed when I just kind of stared at her. "You don't have to; I know it's childish…" Emily trailed off blushing.

I shook my head and gave her a grin. "No way Em it sounds fun!" I said enthusiastically. "Its just I've never you know slept over anyone's before! Well not like a sleepover, wow this'll be cool!" I giggled slightly.

Emily laughed at me. "You sound like a giddy little school girl!" she teased with that familiar Matthews twinkle in her eye. "I'll call Two-Bit to tell him to go bug off for the night, he's at yours isn't he?"

"Uh huh," I nodded yawning again, "Want me to just call?"

"Nah its okay," Emily shrugged, "I'll just tell Two-Bit then you can talk to your brothers."

I nodded in agreement and watched Emily cross the room to pick up the phone. I watched her dial in some numbers, presumably my phone number and she curled the cord around her finger, it looked so cute as she did that! I thought to myself with a smile. You know she really could have been a soc if she was born in a different family, I thought looking her over, Emily sure was pretty and she had that sort of attitude socs have, only Em's a greaser and probably always will be. Luck of the draw I suppose, I sighed, she deserved better. Hell we all did. And there was no denying that.


	12. Chapter 12

"Hi is Two-Bit there please?" Emily said suddenly pausing slightly and then giggling. "No this is Emily Matthews, Two-Bit's sister," Emily giggled clearly waiting for an answer, "I'll have you know I am no longer a baby Sodapop Curtis! I am fourteen!" Emily rolled her eyes at me, I could imagine the stupid things my twin was saying but I smiled all the same. "So is Two-Bit there? He is? Okay great, thanks."

Running my hand through my hair I hoped my brothers wouldn't be mad. You know me just taking off like that. I've kinda of been gone for about two hours I think. I didn't want to upset or annoy them but well I just wanted to get away, that's all. I swear not to make them mad or nothing. I hope they understand.

"Hey Two-Bit," Emily said suddenly, "Look do you think you could crash at the Curtis' tonight? Like not come home tonight?" she asked him when her eyes suddenly widened and her mouth dropped open and I could hear Two-Bit on the other end, not clearly but gosh he sure was talking loud or something! "Keith Matthews how dare you even suggest that!" Emily cried out looking peeved. "I do not want you out of the house because a boy is here! I am not like you!" Emily snapped pulling a face at me. "I'll have you know Pixie's come round and we don't want _you_ or any other _idiotic_ guy here."

Emily looked ready to fire out a couple more things that I'm sure she'd regret and probably even Two-Bit would too so I got up and snatched the phone off her before either could say anymore. I think this annoyed Emily a bit but I gave her a look so she didn't protest much other than glare at me slightly.

"Look Two-Bit I don't know what you said but get over it and learn to trust your sister," I said into the phone. "Put Darry on the phone." I then demanded.

"I won't trust my sister with boys ever!" Two-Bit grumbled slightly as I heard the phone be passed around slightly. "She's fourteen!" I could still hear him moaning loudly.

"Darry?" I asked giggling slightly.

"Yeah it's me. Where are you?" So here kicks in Big Brother Mode. Something quite a few of the gang have this installed in them.

"I'm at the Matthews' house," I told him sitting down in an armchair. "I'm with Emily, Two-Bit's little sister, you know."

"Do you want one of us to get you?"

"No, Em asked if I wanted to stay over," I said nervously. I don't know why I was nervous but I was, mainly because I thought he was mad at me. "So can I? I just you know need air…and to talk to a girl Dar."

"Okay," Darry said easily. Woah that was a bit of a shock. "Just get Two-Bit to drop you off okay in the morning,"

I snorted slightly. "He's coming over isn't he?"

"Yeah,"

"He really doesn't trust her does he?" I asked and then Emily moaned loudly about how annoying and idiotic he was if he didn't trust her and went on to rant and Darry laughed through the phone.

"No I don't think he does," Darry told me and I could hear him stifling his own laughter. "But she is only fourteen,"

"Same age as Ponyboy," I reminded him and watched Emily leave the room sill carrying on, "And Dar trust me," I said in a low voice. "She's grown up quite a bit from the looks of it since we all last saw her that I know just by looking at her."

"Mmm yeah well I suppose that's to be expected." Darry sighed. "I've gotta go make sure Sodapop don't go kill Dally, he seems to have got it in his head Dal knows too."

"Oh really?"

"And we all know you tapped it into him, I'm not an idiot," I held back my comment then and I think her knew. "Whatever you think little sister. Bye."

"Bye." I said placing the phone back on the stand and standing up.

Walking out of the Matthews' lounge room I heard Emily upstairs still muttering about how annoying her brother was and I had to smirk. Hearing a sudden screeching of a car outside my head spun around my green eyes studying the door and the boy who just came in cussing rather loudly until he spotted me and stopped and started grinning at me.

"Hello Two-Bit," I said dryly. "Do you speak to your mother with that mouth?"

"He wouldn't dare," Emily announced from the top of the stairs smirking. "Because his mommy would tell him off."

"Yeah well this is different Pixie," he answered glowering up the stairs to his little sister. "There's a boy ain't there?"

I rolled my eyes and Emily scowled. "Two-Bit Matthews learn to trust your little sister," I said loudly giving him a little shove. "There ain't no boy and if you had've listen to Em here you woulda learnt that I was the person over dummy,"

"So it's just you and you only?" Two-Bit asked suspiciously. I had to wonder why, I mean Emily I would've guessed to be rather trustworthy as a little sister but then again I don't know what goes on behind closed doors now do I? "No boys hidden in your closet?"

Emily giggled slightly. "You can check if you want,"

"And have him touch your clothes!" I cried out dramatically. "Emily you'll get Two-Bit cooties!"

"Oh my god I would!" Emily gasped pretending to swoon. "How awful Pixie!"

"I know," I nodded agreeing turning my nose up at Two-Bit, "Emily watch out we might catch his disease just breathing the same air!"

Emily nodded in agreement sighing loudly. "True, come on Pixie don't stay down there too long I don't want you ill!"

"Okie dokie," I giggled as she grabbed my hand and pulled me up the stairs after her. I glanced back to Two-Bit who was staring at us as if we were visitors from another planet and I grinned and blew him a kiss. "Sorry Two-Bit but girl talk is calling us; we did advice you not to come."

Emily laughed at her brother's blank expression and pushed me into her little bedroom shutting the door behind her. Smiling at me I sat down on her bed and Emily lay down on it propping her head up with her hands her blue eyes sparkling as they rested on my face with curiosity.


	13. Chapter 13

"Don't stare at me!" I moaned tossing a pillow at her.

Emily giggled and pushed the pillow away and resumed staring at me. "Why not?"

"It's annoying," I kept moaning, "And creepy and weird, Emily!" I wailed sticking my tongue out at her, which only caused her to giggle again. "Em I know I'm stunning but really no need to be in awe!" I said jokingly flipping back my brown hair.

Emily burst out laughing and shook her head. "Okay I have a question for you."

"Fire away," I told her leaning against the wall and putting my feet on the bed out in front of me. "Wait, this is gonna be real personal or something isn't it?"

"Yeah it is," Emily told me biting her lip to keep from laughing as I groaned loudly. "Oh Pixie stop moaning, you're a right complainer tonight!" I glared at her and Emily rolled her eyes at me. "Okay Pixie I want to know who in the gang you think is cute."

I just kind of froze and stared at her oddly my eyes slightly narrowed and a smile playing on my lips. "You like one of them don't you Emily?" I whispered.

"Pixie!" Emily hissed her eyes widening and her mouth dropping open slightly before a bright smile lit her face. "No I just wanna know if you think any of them is cute!"

"Humph," I said crossing my arms and smiling to myself. Emily liked someone! I sang out inside my head but I knew she'd hit me if I said it, so I would contain it for now. "Well I don't really know. I've never exactly thought about it."

"Gosh you're boring," Emily immediately replied. Ah I was so right! She didn't really want to know she just wanted to spill the bans to me! The little so and so! "No excitement there,"

"Em who do you like?" I asked her simply knowing that's exactly what she wanted me to ask.

Emily blushed slightly. "It's not one of the gang, you won't know him," she said barely louder than a whisper.

"You promise?"

"I promise."

Sighing slightly I shrugged. "Oh well I don't know them but I still need a name and a description please," I sang out.

Emily laughed at me. "Why?"

"You would demand one from me!" I cried out. "Aren't I allowed one then?"

"Fine," she sighed loudly as if it was going to kill her.

I stifled a giggle. "Okay spill."

"He's name is Caleb and he's in my class at school," Emily told me softly her face going more crimson by the minute. "He's got blonde hair and there dark brown eyes, oh Pixie he is soo cute!"

I giggled along with her and reached out to squeeze her hand. "Does he know you like him?"

"I think so."

"Oh my gosh I have to see him!" I suddenly squealed. "Oh Emily let's call him!" I shrieked after just thinking of it my eyes widening happily.

"Pixie! You can't!" Emily immediately freaked. "Oh my god no Pixie don't!"

I laughed but she looked genuinely pleading so I faked a loud sigh. "Fine, ruin all my fun," but I smiled at her all the same and Emily scowled at me slightly. "Anyway munchkin I'm tired, are you?"

"Not really," Emily shrugged, "But we can go to bed if you want, and why am I a munchkin grandma?"

"Why am I a grandma?" I demanded.

Emily never answered me and instead smirked. Rolling my eyes Emily shoved an old t-shirt, presumably Two-Bit's, in my arms and told me I could wear that to bed. And unless I wished to sleep on the floor, which I really didn't since it was pretty much clothes minus the floor, she'd go make up the couch for me, which I gratefully accepted and she left so I could change.

Pulling on the shirt, I was now positive it was Two-Bit's as I'd seen him wear it before, I had to laugh at how long it was. It didn't reach my knees though; it was about mid thigh but all the same pretty long on me.

Walking out of Emily's bedroom I went downstairs to see Emily had thrown some blankets and a pillow on the couch and was talking to Two-Bit looking slightly annoyed at him. Then again Emily normally always was annoyed with her brother so didn't look that different to me, but I heard the word 'boy' and then 'alone' and I'm pretty sure he was still wary over the whole thing. Honestly I swear he needs to learn of the word 'trust' perhaps I'll throw it in there with 'boy' and see how he reacts.

"Two-Bit stop being a pain in the ass," I told him coming into the lounge and making my presence known to them both, "Thanks Em," I smiled to her.

Emily smiled back at me then looked to her brother and glared at him. "I told you that you were being an ass,"

"Now, now Pixie you're wearing one of my shirts!" Two-Bit said pretending to look annoyed. "That can't do."

I rolled my eyes and before I could respond to him he tackled me, yes he _tackled_ me onto the couch. I was too shocked to respond and Two-Bit was simply smiling that good ol' Two-Bit grin. I heard Emily sigh loudly.

"Oh my gosh seriously wait until I'm _out_ of the room, Jesus Christ," she muttered leaving the room. "And he lectures me!" I could hear her faintly.

Smirking slightly I pushed Two-Bit off of me. "And why did you do that then?" I demanded.

"'Cause I could,"

"Next time you do that Matthews you die," I told him with a sweet smile kicking him off the couch and pulling a blanket over me. "Goodnight Two-Bit, which means you can now leave the room," I added seeing him just stand there.

Two-Bit rolled his eyes and turned the light off and went upstairs. I smiled to myself and yawned. Blinking my eyes slowly I drifted off into a dreamless sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

On Tuesday morning once I woke up Emily gave me a rushed goodbye and bolted out of the door. Apparently she was going to be late for school, and she's still at junior high so it's a bit closer than the high school. Two-Bit didn't look that bothered that he was going to be late but all the same I just pulled my jeans on and left his shirt on so he could go to school. I don't care if he didn't mind being late but I minded him being late, I did not want him getting a detention on my conscience.

As soon as he dropped me off at my house he sure sped off for someone that didn't mind being late. No wait. He was always speeding so in truth I'm sure he still probably didn't care. Rubbing my eyes sleepily I trudged up the porch and got inside. No expecting to see anyone home I let out a yelp when I saw Sodapop lounging on the couch watching the TV.

"Sodapop what are you doing here?" I demanded stifling a yawn as I flopped on the couch by Soda's feet. "What happened to work?"

"It burnt down." Soda said distractedly.

"What?" I shrieked staring at him. "Is everyone okay?"

"Huh?" he asked his eyes snapping out of a trance.

"Your work, did it seriously burn down?"

"Oh no." Sodapop said with a grin. "The house did there," Sodapop informed me pointing to the TV and I rolled my eyes.

"So what's your excuse for being home?" I asked him. "The deal was if you didn't go to school you had to work, or are you coming back to school?" I asked beginning to get excited at the thought.

"Nah I just felt like spending the day with my psychotic sister who ran out on us last night." Sodapop told me his eyes glued back to the TV again. "Psycho," he muttered under his breath shaking his head.

"I heard that!" I exclaimed loudly.

Sodapop laughed and looked at me. "It's the truth."

"Mmm probably," I said agreeing. "You weren't to worried were you?"

"We weren't worried!" Sodapop exclaimed. "Hell we were ready to throw a party when we saw the back of you!"

"Soda!"

Sodapop burst out laughing and ruffled my hair. "Aw you know I'm joking sister dear," I scowled jokingly and smiled. "We know you can take care of yourself Pix, trust me you put up a good fight when you wanna,"

"I don't fight." I pointed out.

"Well a yellin' one you sure can," Soda grinned to me.

I rolled my eyes and smiled standing up. "There any cake left?"

"You're having cake for breakfast? Why?"

I shrugged. "No clue. I just feel like it," I told him wandering into the kitchen and finding there was some left. "Mmm Darry made this didn't he?" I asked after eating a mouthful.

"Ya I think,"

"Tastes nicer," I said dodging the pillow that was thrown at me. "Not too sweet you know,"

"Sweets better," Sodapop said stubbornly.

I laughed. I devoured the cake pretty fast. No clue why. I don't even like cake! Well not really, not for breakfast at the very least. But well I guess some things can change! And I suppose it also helped that Sodapop didn't make it, as I don't really like eating something containing enough sugar for a hundred cakes if you get me.

"I'm going in the shower and then you're talking to me." I announced poking Sodapop in the ribs. "You wanna talk to me about something and I want to know, got it buddy?"

Sodapop grunted in response and I left to go shower and change. Then I froze. I mean I was still wearing Two-Bit's shirt! Anyone could get the wrong idea for that! I froze halfway upstairs and thought Sodapop could have…nah he wouldn't think that…would he? Biting my lip I shrugged, I doubted her did, he knew me after all.

As soon as I'd showered and changed I ran downstairs and flopped onto the couch next to Sodapop and then looked to him expectantly. Sodapop upon finally realizing that I wanted to talk to him began to ignore me. Well tried to only I kinda stood in front of the TV so he didn't quite have a distraction.

"Sodapop Patrick Curtis I want to know what's wrong and I want to know what's wrong right now."

"Not too self occupied are you sister dearest?" He said sweetly. Suck up.

"'Course not, now spit it out," I demanded sitting back down onto the couch.

Sodapop stared at his feet. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh come on boy since when were you one to shut up? I'm the secretive one in this family, hell you're not even the quiet one, Ponyboy is. Sodapop please," I asked more softly reaching for his hand. "Soda please I just wanna help you."

"It's Sandy." Sodapop said quietly Turing to look at me his eyes filling with tears. Oh boy.

I squeezed his hand. This girl was gonna die if he seriously started crying. "What did she do baby?" I asked him.

"She's pregnant."

I froze. My mouth was open, a bit rude I know but my brother's girlfriend was pregnant. This is not meant to happen.

"Sodapop," I sighed sadly.

"It's not mine." Sodapop said his lips trembling. "Pixie the baby isn't mine, but I asked her to marry me anyway but she still said no."

I felt my own eyes fill with tears a shiver ran up my spine. The one, bless him, who was the least responsible of the four of us was willing to commit to someone that much when the baby wasn't even his. This was a big step I knew and the cow still denied him that. Sure he's better off without her but just look at him. God I hate her so much right now.

"Whose is it?"

"I don't know," Soda sobbed. I instantly reached forward and hugged him. "She's gone to live with her Aunt in California Pixie, she left on Saturday."

"Oh Soda," I whispered holding him tighter. "Stop the tears. Please don't cry Sodapop, I don't wanna see you like this, broken. You're worth so much more baby, she wasn't the one if she couldn't see the beautiful Sodapop right here in my arms baby," I told him softly looking at my twin in the eye. "Darry know?"

"Told him on Friday, but I was gonna ask her before that you know." Sodapop told me his tears drying up. "I dunno what I'll do without her."

"Find someone else." I said simply squeezing his hand again. "Sodapop there's someone right out there for all of us, we just have to find them in our own time. We may have to search for them, we may have to take a risk to get to them, they may be right under our noses but they're out there, we've just gotta wait for time to find them for us."

Sodapop gave me a sad smile and nodded. "I love you Pixie."

"I love you too Sodapop." I told him. "Just you know, wait, date around. She'll come up, when we least expect it. I'll know when she's right and so will you."

"Thanks."

I just gave him a bit of a smile in return and said nothing. Sodapop let go of my hand and muttered something about he should go to work and within thirty minutes was out the door and off to the DX and yet again I was left with a day to my own and that homework was sitting upstairs waiting to be completed. Too bad it wouldn't. I had other things to preoccupy my mind.

My future in Tulsa was being the main one.


	15. Chapter 15

"Math is the source of all evil!" I suddenly declared tossing my math book to the floor in pure annoyance. I sat there cross-legged on the couch glaring at it. "I hate you. Stupid book."

"You hate a book?" Someone's voice interrupted my stand off with the book.

Turning bright red I turned to see Two-Bit standing a few metres away from me looking thoroughly amused as he stood there holding…ice cream?

"It's a maths book. Do I need to explain more?" I asked him my cheeks still flushed pink.

Two-Bit shook his head and grinned. "Nope you don't. But I think this is melting," He informed me holding up the ice cream, yes ice cream…why did he have ice cream? Anyway he held it up to me so I could see it. I couldn't help but stare at him.

"Two-Bit why do you have ice cream?"

"Thought you could use some cheering up." Two-Bit said simply shoving it into my hands…ew it was well kinda melting slowly. I shuddered. Yuck.

"Thanks I guess," I said feeling bewildered. "You hold it, I'll get the spoons,"

I insisted leaping off the couch and shoving it in his hands. Not to sound all crazy but well melting ice cream is pretty gross. And sticky. I pulled a face and grabbed two spoons from the cutlery drawer and passed one to Two-Bit as he peeled the lid off of the container and grinned to me already digging in.

I laughed as he gulped it down and suddenly started pulling weird faces. "Brain freeze?" I asked him giggling and he nodded. "Aw your poor little brain!" I teased him taking the opportunity to devour the majority of it whilst he was busy holding his head and pulling hilarious faces.

"Pig!" Two-Bit cried out snatching it from me…yeah I actually held it for a bit. Big surprise.

"Hey Matthews!" I shrieked grabbing it off him. "I love ice cream it's all mine!" I said grinning.

"Mine now," Two-Bit grinned grabbing it off me and began scraping at the bottom.

"Pig," I told him tossing back my hair. "You are soo unbelievably childish you know,"

"You were just screaming it was all yours!" he protested staring at me.

Seeking my opportunity I took it from him and finished it off grinning wickedly at Two-Bit who pretended to be all pouty and upset over it. I laughed at him and took his spoon from him.

"Not too upset are you?" I asked him tauntingly as I disappeared into the kitchen, throwing the spoons in the sink and the container in the bin.

"How could I be upset when I'm liking the view?" Two-Bit replied from right behind me.

My brows furrowed instantly. What? "Huh?" I asked him turning around and pretty much walking right into him.

"I like the view," Two-Bit whispered in my ear bending down to…kiss me.

I was in shock. His lips and mine parted and I hadn't moved an inch. I was so frozen by the fact one of my best friends had just kissed me. I knew my face was burning and I was awkwardly trying to avoid his eyes but when I met with his eyes he looked worried and his own face was a shade or two darker than mine I think.

"I'm sorry." Two-Bit muttered nervously moving away from me.

I just stared at him. My mouth slightly open, my eyes staring at him.

"This will be between us okay?"

"Okay," I finally managed to say shaking myself slightly. "Um what was that?"

"Uh," Two-Bit said turning darker and darker red.

"Pixie we got us a spy!" Steve screamed out suddenly the screen door slamming open and two pairs of heavy footsteps came into the house and Two-bit immediately moved further away from me and I moved to the other side of the room too. "Oh hey Two-Bit," Steve said spotting him as he came into the kitchen grinning madly. "That Cherry chick, she's our spy!"

"Yeah came up to us just now in the lot with Dal!" Sodapop said enthusiastically slinging an arm around my shoulder and grinning to Two-Bit. "What's with your face?" He demanded staring at Two-Bit oddly.

Steve's head swiveled from looking at my brother and I to staring at Two-Bit who clearly didn't know what to say. He's not good like that. Being put on the spot. Well not when it comes to things he's gotta keep quiet at least.

"I dared him to moon a car," I said quickly trying to sound nonchalant, I think it failed but they both turned to look at me. "Car of soccy girls, you know probably not the most delightful thing Two-Bit's done this year." I said smiling slightly at Two-Bit who looked relieved at my lie.

"Serious?" Sodapop snorted. "You dared him to do that?"

"Yup," I said as if it was the plainest thing in the world. "Rather funny too,"

Steve and Sodapop began laughing and talking with Two-Bit who was exaggerating my lie by a mile, like he had actually done it. I shook my head and had to laugh. Freaks.


	16. Chapter 16

'You're nuts' were the two words running through my head throughout my entire morning. Normally when someone says that to me I put up a good damn fight to prove that I'm not but uh well in truth I am nuts. I'm absolutely idiotic to be doing this right night. Doing what you ask? Going to damn school.

I cussed myself in my head. Darry told me I shouldn't go but that didn't stop me. Sodapop wouldn't look me in the eye and only briefly muttered 'Watch out Pixie, they'll be mad,' before leaving the house with Steve who was skipping who only rolled his eyes, not even bothering to comment, he didn't have to, I knew what he thought. Two-Bit told me I was nuts just before we entered the building. And he was right.

He'd left me straight away, 'cause he sucks, we don't have the same classes, and well he hadn't been able to look at me in the eye since yesterday afternoon. Pretty understandable though as I could barely meet his eye either. And funnily enough no one had noticed yet, well maybe Dal had but I was still kinda ignoring him so you know.

I don't know how I managed this whole morning. I was getting soc boys hissing things to me, the girls didn't say anything but to me that was worse that words. The looks of pure hatred and disgust that crossed their faces when they realize the association I had with the two 'soc killers' as they'd all called them was so shocking and disgusting. The boys hissed the foulest things you'd believe in my ears in class and through the halls. None of them had touched me yet. But all the same I'd never imagined the safe haven I called school to be so petrifying.

But the words to me were worse than anything physical they could do. Because in my heart Ponyboy and Johnnycakes were as pure as gold and hearing them say all those nasty things about two people I loved the most in this world was like stabbing a knife in there, twisting it and then wrenching it out without a care in the world.

They were getting to me in the worst possible way and they knew it. I hadn't crumbled yet. I kept up my cool façade as long as I'd be able to. I didn't want to snap at them, I'd be asking for it then, I had to ignore them, as if their comments simply went over my head although they were hitting me where it hurt the most. My heart.

I was going to fourth period when I'd cracked. I'd stayed cool throughout the whole day even though I didn't want to. I wanted to scream and shout and o plain mental but I held it in. It wasn't until I heard what that randy boy said I snapped. You have no idea how much hate filled my body at that moment. I hated him more than hate itself. I actually wanted to kill him. The anger that pierced my heart in that one instant was excruciating.

"Hey Curtis," Randy hissed as I walked by to my locker. I remained cool and collected as I ignored him. "I know you can hear me, and I saw exactly what your no good brother and his friend did to my buddy Bob,"

"And what was that?" I snapped turning and staring him in the eye coldly.

"He was killed in cold blood," Randy hissed in my ear, his face inches from my own. I can't even describe the fear that ran through my body as his friends surrounded me. "But they were provoked."

Randy was touching me but I was pinned against the locker as if he was touching me. My face paled I'm sure and my green eyes narrowed slightly. Fear and pure anger ran through my body. My heart felt like it was being pierced. Provoked. Suddenly it all made sense.

"What the fuck did you do o my brother?" I demanded in a low cold voice that even shocked myself, my eyes flashing with anger, my fists clenched underneath my pile of books.

"Naughty, naughty greasy," Another boy said with a triumphant sneer plastered across his slimy scummy face. "Mind your tongue, you're with real gentlemen now,"

"What are you taking about?"

"Those so called gentlemen that pay you for sex," He said with a smug look. "Now we would never pay you, you're not worth a cent,"

My mouth dropped open and I didn't even realize what I was doing until I felt the pain sour through my knuckles as my fist made contact with the socs face. My eyes widened slightly as I pulled my fist back, I'd never actually hit someone before and he was cursing blue murder at me but that Randy guy shut him up, saying something about 'She's only a grease'.

"Seems you're headed in that same direction your dear brother was going on Friday." Randy said in that same hissing voice, coldness seemed impenetrable within him. "They retaliated but the cops will never know. As we're only the Socials, we don't touch scum like you."

"You provoked them! You're no good trash!" I cried out loudly. "You might have the money but you're a no good jerk!"

Randy looked away as if I slapped him. "Wanna know what we did to you're brother grease?"

"What?" I spat out.

"Tried to drown him," he laughed coldly. "The other one killed Bob. He deserved to die your brother. He's not gonna do anythin' for society, why waste the breathing space on no good hoods like you?"

That was it. The turning point. It was one thing punching that other soc but Randy was clearly asking for it. This time I really did slap him. Good and hard right across the face, he recoiled from me and I saw a red mark appear slowly on his cheek.

"Don't you ever -" Randy snapped angrily but before he could finish a girl's voice rang through the hall, she sure sounded angry.

"Randy you leave her alone!" Cherry Valance snapped, her eyes were red and puffy and right on her heels was Marcia who looked bitter. "What did she ever do to you?"

"Dammit Cherry! Her brother killed Bob! Your boyfriend!" Randy cried out angrily slamming his fist into the locker, inches from my head.

"Yeah her brother!" Marcia spat out her arms folded across her nice neat blouse. "She didn't do nothin' Randy no you leave her alone! Don't you think she's worried enough about him being missing?"

"He killed Bob!" Randy roared and the soccy boys all nodded and murmured angrily.

"What's done is done Randy!" Marcia cried out shrilly, I'd never once heard that girl raise her voice before. She sure was madder than that Cherry. "It can't be taken back now no matter how much you want it! You were all drunk so you sure deserved it picking a fight with two kids!"

"They had a blade Marcia," Randy said in a low voice, but it was full of anger and hatred.

"And you didn't?" Cherry spoke up swallowing back tears. "I might've loved Bob but you all sure asked for it, what you did wasn't right now leave her alone."

"Randy please," Marcia said sounding pleading. "Just do it. One last thing for me, just leave her alone, stop the fighting, Bob wouldn't have wanted it like that," her whispered voice said sadly her arm thrown around her friend.

"Just stop being so god damned stupid!" Cherry cried out before bursting into tears and walking away, Marcia running after her, throwing us one last look of despair, she was pleadingly looking at Randy before they disappeared from our sight and Randy's head swiveled back to me.

"They were asking for it, probably like you do grease." He spat out one last time.

A couple of the socs threw me dirty looks before sauntering off. Randy lingered there for a moment. I was so scared and I was pinned up against the locker still. I could feel my lip trembling and my anger was welling up inside of me. When Randy turned around and began walking away I sighed with slight relief before finally calling out to him.

"Hey Randy?"

"What?" He snapped turning around to have his face connect with my fist. Boy would that bruise.

"You fucking bastard." I hissed before I spun around on my heel storming off in the direction for the front doors to the school.

"You bitch!" he screamed.

I didn't bother replying. A teacher stuck his head out of his classroom door but said nothing, I'm gonna guess Randy had cleared off but I don't give a damn. He should go rot in hell. Trying to drown Ponyboy! No wonder Johnny fucking killed that stupid Bob Sheldon guy! Retaliation for trying to kill his best friend!

I shook my head angrily and banged open the front doors to our high school and strolled out onto the street as if I didn't have a care in the world. But in truth it felt like I had the whole weight of the world on my shoulders. Because they went after my brother my brother and Johnnycakes fought back. Because they fought back they tried to drown Ponyboy. Because they tried to drown Ponyboy Johnny Cade stabbed Robert Sheldon. Because he killed that boy they had to skip town and who knows where they are. Because they killed someone they might make Pony and I go to homes. Because of the socs my world was destroyed and what was left on it was weighing down on me.

I tried to hold back my tears and stifle my sobs but it failed and about three blocks from the high school I started to cry with pain and fear. Ponyboy cold have been the one dead instead of that boy! I was so lucky Johnny killed that soc but at the same time it was so awful that a boy that young had to kill another so young. It was like the world was putting us in the worst situations so they could get some entertainment. This was all so sick and twisted.

My tears soon dried up. I'd long cried them out over the past few days it wouldn't surprise me in the least if I didn't shed another tear for the rest of my life but that sorrow quickly turned to pure anger. I felt like destroying everything in sight. Even threatening Dallas so he could tell me where they were. I was just so damned mad. But the more it stayed inside me the worse I felt and eventually I just wanted to scream. But I never got the chance as I heard my own name screamed out.


	17. Chapter 17

"Pixie!" Sodapop screamed out at me. "Pixie Elizabeth you ain't skipping are you? You little rebel!" he shouted out roaring with laughter.

"Never knew she had a rebellious streak in her!" Steve Randle cried out cracking up himself.

I spun around and stormed across the street to the DX and crossed my arms across my chest.

"Do you have any idea what those bastards tried doing on Friday night?" I demanded my face blazing.

Steve and Sodapop glanced at each other warily and I saw my twin gulp lightly. "Um what Pixie?" Sodapop asked me.

"They were trying to drown Ponyboy!" I cried out angrily. "Can you believe that! They were provoked! I mean its not like they ever would kill one on purpose anyway but they goddamn gave me proof by telling me! But can you believe it?" I said ranting. "Trying to drown a fourteen year old! What sort of people are they? They are sick bastards they should've died with their friend! Then they said we don't even deserve the air to breathe! Can you believe it?"

Sodapop place his hands on both my shoulders and stared me in the eye. "Pixie number one take a breath," I scowled at him. "Number two you make no sense, what do you mean they told you?" I sighed impatiently. "And number three are you seriously skipping? Miss Goody-Two-Shoes?" I rolled my eyes.

"Number one I am breathing," Sodapop snorted at me. "Number two I make perfect sense, if you'll let me explain." Sodapop and Steve shared a look as if to say 'Sense? She has sense?' I've seen that look before trust me. "And number three I'm not a goody goody!"

Steve burst out laughing. "Now that's a lie."

"Okay I am a _little_,"

"A little?" Steve smirked. "Try a whole lot!"

"Shut up Randle I wanna know why she's talking like a crazy person!" Sodapop said hushing his best friend.

"She is crazy," Steve said trying to cover it with a cough but I hit his arm and he at least had the decency to not retort.

"Anyway spill it Pixie, we ain't got all day,"

"Fine." I said bitterly sitting down on the curb. "One of those socs, that Randy guy, do you know him Steve?"

"Mmm." He mumbled impatiently.

"Well he found me on the way to my locker,"

"He didn't touch you did he?" Sodapop demanded.

I glared at him. "Do you wanna know or what?" He scowled at me but said nothing. "He found me and began talking to me, I was trying to ignore him 'cause why should I talk to him? Only there was 'bout five of them and one of me,"

"Those -" Steve began but Sodapop slammed him hard in the ribs before he could finish.

"He said," I whispered. "He said he was killed in cold blood. But they, J-Johnnycakes and P-Ponyboy, were provoked," I said my eyes big as I looked up at them. "Told me they were gonna drown Pon, Johnny you know after that."

"Serious?" Sodapop asked in a soft voice.

I nodded weakly. "I slapped him one when those cheerleaders Sherri and Marcia came along."

"What'd they say?"

"Told 'em to back off," I said sighing slightly. "She looked bad I guess, seeing as her boyfriend was dead, good of her to be a spy then again. They left after that, the girls I mean, the boys left too. But I called back to Randy."

"Why?" Steve asked his face screwed up in confusion and disgust. "Why would you wanna talk to that slime?"

"I punched him." I admitted with a slight smile. "Then I left. You should've heard 'em Sodapop," I said frowning sadly. "Oh they were just awful, I've never felt so dirty and so bad about who I am in my whole life. The things they said," I said holding back my tears. "It was as if we should all be dead, like we don't belong. And it seemed so convincing," I whispered as Sodapop squeezed my hand.

"Aw Pixie don't listen to any of that crap," Steve told me. "We all know it ain't the truth, what they say means nothing at all."

" I know,"

"See I knew you shouldn't have gotten involved," Sodapop sighed loudly getting off the curb and helping me up, "You get too upset Pixie, y'know you do so next time just don't."

"I didn't think they'd be that bad though!" I wailed as Sodapop rolled his eyes slightly. "Oh come off it Sodapop you don't go to our school you can't possibly imagine what I went through." I told him my eyes blazing slightly.

"Yeah well I'm sure there just the same as they are out here Pixie, and that ain't the point," Sodapop said sounding kinda angry. And well he doesn't exactly get angry either so you can bet I was listening. "I told you not to go get involved Pix and you get involved!" My face turned a shade or two darker than I would've wanted and Steve was eyeing us. "Seriously Pix I just want you to stay safe, please just stay out o it," Soda said looking pleading at me.

I bit my lip. Did I really have to? But his eyes were on me, they were pleading, damn him! He knows how to make me give in! "I'll try," I whispered slightly peeved.

"Good, looks like Matthews stalked ya down," Sodapop said pointing to Two-Bit's car which skidded to a stop outside the DX and he hopped out grinning slightly.

"Did you seriously punch him?" He demanded grinning toothily. "Or is Cherry making up lies to our class?"

I smiled slightly. "Perhaps,"

"Aw no way Pixie! Serious?"

I avoided his eyes but couldn't wipe the smile off of my face and Two-Bit roared with laughter.

"Didn't know your sister had it in her!"

Steve laughed. "Neither did I 'til she punched me once,"

"When?" Sodapop and I both demanded.

Steve shrugged. "Awhile back, you sure were mad that day, but it didn't help that Dally egged you on to hit me."

"Did it hurt?" Two-Bit asked with a smirk.

"No she's a chick!"

"No I'm a man," I said rolling my eyes and Sodapop stared at me weirdly and I giggled. "It was a joke guys! A joke! Don't you think mom would've mentioned it?" I laughed.

"I'm beginning to suspect things," Sodapop said cautiously staring at me.

I laughed and hit him softly. "Soda!"

"I'm joking! Jesus Christ woman!"

I giggled. "You damn well better be," I threatened and Sodapop laughed with me. "Anyway I think I'm gonna head home with the maniac, I'll see you later I suppose,"

"Bye Pixie!" Sodapop hollered as I stepped into Two-Bit's car. "Now you two behave yourselves!" He apparently thought he was funny as he as laughing loudly and even Steve had a bit of a smile on him before he disappeared into the garage.

I rolled my eyes and quickly did up the seat belt as Two-Bit has a lead foot and I was instantly thrown back against the seat at the pure speed he was going. I couldn't even turn my head to glare at him and I was too lazy to bother with shouting at him. Probably should have but as he stopped at our house I'd made it alive no point in shouting now…I'd save it for next time instead, I thought grinning wickedly to myself. He'd never know what hit him.

"You're awful quiet today y'know," Two-Bit said breaking through my thoughts as we walked up to my house. "School really that bad Pixiedust?"

"Well it was hardly good now was it?" I said with a slight shrug. "No quieter than normal Matthews, you just ain't paying much attention, go back to Mickey," I told him flicking on the TV as I walked past it.

"Aw just wanna get rid of me now?" Two-Bit cried out sitting down on the ground in front of the TV.

Rolling my eyes I sauntered into the kitchen. "Pretty much," I called back to see Dallas sitting at our kitchen table his eyes on me. I raised my brows. "What do you want Dally?"

"You." He smirked as I slipped into a seat and pulled a disgusted face.

"Stop being gross," I told him straight out. "You're a brother. And I know you're full of shit too."

"How do you know?" Dally asked me his eyes sparkling.

"I don't. I guessed. And I'm right." I said with a self-satisfied smirk.

Dally smiled coldly. "Yeah you always apparently are."

"Duh." I said resting my head in my palms. "Get to the point now please. Until you tell me where Johnny and Pony are I'm not gonna be nice to you."

"Well ya better start being nice to me then Curtis 'cause I'm taking you to them tomorrow, got it?" He demanded in a low voice. My mouth dropped open and I stared at him. "That'll be a yes you'll come then I take it. Tell no one about it okay, just say you've gone to see Two-Bit's sister or something for the day."

I was slightly puzzled. "Why am I gonna go see 'em? And you do know," I said happily.

"'Course I did. And you'll never leave me alone 'til you do see them, and you're the only one that'll keep your trap shut." He said scraping his chair as he stood up. "Be ready by eight okay?"

"'Kay," I said softly looking him in the eye. "Thanks Dal, you're not all that bad when you wanna be." I smiled and Dally shook his head with a smirk. "Honest. But learn that I'm always right,"

"_Sure_ you're always right," Dally laughed walking to our back door. "Just keep quiet, okay?"

"Uh huh," I said with a happy grin.

I watched Dally Winston disappear from our house and as soon as he left and I knew he'd be out of earshot I began shrieking and crying out like a crazy person. I was so delighted. They were both alright and I was gonna get to see them! I was ecstatic about it all but of course everyone else thought I was crazy. I wasn't. But I was going to get to see Ponyboy! I only wish I could've told Sodapop, he looks more and more broken as each day passes. He'd see Ponyboy soon enough…I mean how long could you hide out for?


	18. Chapter 18

"So you staying home today then Pixie?" Darry asked me grabbing his keys from the coffee table.

I nodded. "Mmm, may go out to see, uh, Emily,"

"She sick or somethin'?"

"Yeah something like that," I mumbled and Darry nodded.

"'Kay, I'll see you tonight then, stay outta trouble, got it?"

I nodded and Darry walked out of the door and I sighed with relief. Before I could feel too safe though I heard someone snort from behind me and Sodapop stood in front of me, his arms crossed and a confused expression on his face.

"To hell you're going to see Emily! We've barely seen her in years the other day was pretty weird but like you'd be seeing her again 'specially when she ain't even sick you liar!" Sodapop cried out shaking his head. "Come out of it Pix, what you doin'?"

"Sodapop I'm seeing Emily."

"Liar. She wouldn't be up at the crack of dawn. You'd have slept in at least like normal." Sodapop said eyeing me. "Now seriously what are you planning girl?"

I sighed loudly. "Go 'way Soda I don't wanna have to lie to you,"

"Then don't."

"Okay well that requires you to go, NOW!" I said trying to push him to the door and failing as he laughed at me. "Aw Sodapop please go! You'll know later!"

"Can't you just tell me?"

"NO!" I moaned loudly.

"You're a pain in the ass sometimes sister."

"So are you," I retorted successfully shoving him out the door. "Now bug off to work!"

"I love you too honey!" He said blowing kisses to me.

I rolled my eyes. "Soda stop being a dumbass!"

"Got it off you!"

"Loser."

"I know you are what am I?" Sodapop replied childishly.

I poked my tongue out at him and he laughed and jumped into Steve's car, which had just pulled up. Shaking my head with a smile I waved them off and as soon as the car as out of sight I sunk down on the steps of the porch nervously. That was one close call…any longer I would've spilt it, it's impossible to lie to Sodapop as he makes you feel as guilty as hell.

I started to tap my foot nervously and I began chewing on my lip. I do that whenever I'm nervous. I'm sure if any of the guys came by now they'd be able to tell instantly what I was going to be able to do. I seemed to give things away really easily without meaning to. I'm good with most secrets but its just they're all real able to read my body language as my mom would say.

I glanced at my watch. It was only seven thirty. Dally never really gave me a time but I'd give him 'til eight then I'd call him. I was getting slowly impatient over the next few minutes and began untying and retying my Converse high tops about three times before that got boring and I decided to tie my hair up. Satisfied with my shoes and my hair I began trying to smooth the crinkles out of my jeans, failing mind you, when Dallys car, or really Buck Merril's, skidded to a stop.

"Get in Curtis." Dally called out leaning over to the passenger side and throwing open the door. "Be quick about it!" He replied sarcastically as I hadn't moved an inch.

I stood straight up and walked to the car and sat inside closing the door slowly and turning to look at him. "So like, you serious about this?"

"Huh?"

"I'm gonna get to see Ponyboy right?"

"Well yeah."

I smiled with relief and did up my seatbelt quickly as Dally took off. "That's good."

Daly nodded and stared straight at the road. "Anyone know anything?"

"Nope. Sodapop would've but I kicked him outta the house," I informed him. "But just for the record I'm out seeing Emily okay, she's sick so you keep to that too,"

Dally turned and stared at me. "You seen her lately?"

"The other day, why?"

Dally shrugged and went back to focusing on the road. "Just seems to have changed y'know?" I nodded although I really didn't. "I mean you remember before their dad left she kept all that shit from everyone?"

"Mmm yeah,"

"Do ya reckon she's doing it now?"

As he stopped the car at the traffic lights I felt his light blue eyes burning into my face as I looked at him.

"Why would she be hiding stuff from us now Dal?"

"I don't know. But it's not like she ever sees any of anymore does she?"

"But her and Pony stopped being in the same classes," I shrugged. "Have you seen her or something?"

"Yeah I've seen her quite a bit in the past few months." Dally said with a slight laugh. "Don't think Matthews would be impressed if he knew where either but she sure don't seem to be a kid no more. She's more messed up than any of us could know I reckon."

I froze slightly as we suddenly left the city and out for the country. But I wasn't paying the slightest bit of attention to the scenery my mind was filled with thoughts of the sweet girl I'd spoken with the other night. The girl who was upset that she'd never had a boyfriend or a kiss. Perhaps that was a façade. Or perhaps her other side was her tough girl façade.

"Are you serious? Where?"

"Bucks a couple of times, tad not herself if you get me." Dal said taking a sharp turn at full sped and I was flung against the door. "Never would've pictured it if I hadn't seen her for myself. Guess her old man leaving affected her worse than we all thought."

I nodded. I was speechless. This could not be true! Emily would never drink or go to parties! Well not the Emily I knew. Back when we were kids Emily was loud and rough around us but then she'd be all sweet and pretty and perfect…never a party go-er in either sense. I can't picture this at all. Weird.

Dally noticed my silence because he spoke up. "You don't believe me do you?"

I wrinkled my nose slightly. "Well its just I can't picture it, I mean the other night she told me she was worried because she'd never even had her first kiss! It just doesn't fit, you know?"

"No I don't know." Dally said bluntly as he took a sharp turn around the corner ignoring my glare as I was flung against the door again. That'd bruise I'm telling you. "But I sure as hell saw her there."

"Anyone else know?"

"Feel like seeing Darry's face?"

I bit my lip and suppressed my giggle. That'd be a sight. Perhaps I never mentioned it before but in our gang you either look out for someone or you are looked out for ourselves. I mean we all look out for one another and that but we all tend to specifically have one person we look out for or are looked out for themselves.

Sodapop always looked out for Ponyboy, but they're so close anyway I'm not sure if Ponyboy ever noticed it. Steve looked out for me, but seeing as we're best friends it was more mutual looking out for each other. Dally clearly looked out for Johnny, god he loved that boy so much. In truth Two-Bit was kinda singled out…none of us ever really classified him as responsible enough to look after someone else, I mean in truth he needed to be looked out for! But for Darry he was closest to Emily. Always had been. Weird relationship there. He was the big brother she lacked. It was so cute to see him get worried over ere when we were little I admit. But I imagine he'd totally flip if he knew she'd been to Bucks. He'd go absolutely mental.


	19. Chapter 19

"So where exactly is it that we're going?" I finally had the guts to ask as the car was starting to head up a steep hill. "I mean we've been driving _forever_." I exaggerated. Actually just glancing at my watch it'd only been about forty five minutes.

"You might blab,"

"As if!" I snorted.

Dally smirked. "I don't care. When you go back you can at least say to anyone you saw Ponyboy and Johnny but you won't have a clue where it is so you can't tell or even hint to them 'cause your hopeless with directions."

You know he really did have a valid point. I cussed to him and he just roared with laughter. Crossing my arms huffily I stared out the window at the scenery which was passing us at amazing speeds. It was more like blurs of colours rather than something like a tree as they all blended in, since well since when would Dally ever drive like a normal person instead of a maniac? Never. Well actually maybe when he got his license, but that hardly lasted long!

"Are we there yet?" I whined closing my eyes and leaning back against the chair. What can I say I was impatient and I felt sick. God I swear he was most definitely the worst of them all hen it came to speeding! I can't wait 'til I get my own car…then I'll never have to experience carsickness ever again.

"Yeah we are." Dally said as the car screeched to a stop outside what looked like a ruin and a huge dust cloud seemed to engulf the trees behind the car and I started coughing and he rolled his eyes at me.

Stumbling out of the car coughing Dally let out a whistle. Our gangs signal. I find personally that it would help if I was able to whistle but they don't care whether or not I can do it. Trust me I've pointed this out to them they pretty much said something like 'Your point?'

Dally sauntered into the building, well I think it's a church, I'll ask him later, ahead of me and I could hear him laugh loudly and say something that sounding like 'Well lookie here at blondie!' Which was you know weird, I followed him cautiously and I could see him up ahead of me.

"Oh and there's also someone else here," Dally shrugged. "The psychopath would've killed me otherwise."

"Psychopath?" Johnny and Ponyboy spoke out in unison. I could even picture the confusion on their faces.

I stepped into the dirty disgusting looking room and stepped out from behind Dally. You know if I see a rat in here damn Ponyboy I am not staying in here! But my thoughts of rats were sidetracked as soon as I spotted my Ponyboy with his new short _blonde_ hair. Then I shrieked.

"Ponyboy!" I cried out flinging my arms around him and squeezing him right. "Oh my god boy you scared us so much! Don't you ever do that again!" I wailed getting tearful staring him in the eye. "What have you done to your hair? It's short! And blonde!" I said with a slight laugh as Ponyboy stared back at me. "And you Johnny!" I shirked as his eyes widened and he took a step back as I pounced on him with a hug. "Boy don't you ever do that again now! Ad look at your tuff hair to!"

"Jesus Christ shut up!" Dally said loudly. "You were quiet all week now you won't shut your trap."

"Oh shut up Winston," I replied looking at the two of them. "We were all so worried. Don't you ever try run away again!"

"Pixie?" Ponyboy spoke up.

I turned to look at him, "Yeah honey?"

"I'm not your honey," he hissed. Oh yeah! The motherly thing…well damn him he had no idea what the past week was like! "Please like calm down."

"Oh." I whispered flushing slightly. "But I'm so glad to see you! The past week was hell without the two of you!"

"Yeah she suspected me right away, jumped down my neck." Dally butted in and the two boys shared a look. "Soon as they all saw that body she," he said pointing to me. "Thought it was me that knew. Guess she does have a brain in her after all."

I pulled a face. "Well I was right wasn't I!"

"You think too much Pixie." Johnny said in that whispered voice of his.

I grinned.

"You two wanna go to the Dairy Queen or somethin'?" Dally asked. "You must be hungry."

"Yes!" Ponyboy and Johnny chorused loudly and very eagerly following Dally back out to the car.

I trailed after them. I was too excited by the fact I was seeing these two to really think about my stomach right now. I could wait 'til later to eat. Right now I was focusing every energy into talking to these two and convincing them to get their butts back to Tulsa.

Johnny was sitting up front with Dally and they, Johnny and Pony, were talking to him about something or other. Again my attention seemed to disappear and I was just staring at the newly blonde headed Ponyboy. A smile lit my face as I watched him. I shouldn't be smiling. I mean the situation was so serious but it'd been so long since I'd seen him and it just made me want to smile and hug him. And he'd probably kill me if I tried to hug him again so I'd resist from doing that and stick to the goofy grin plastered across my face.

Ignoring Dallas' look of annoyance when I'd refused to eat something his focus suddenly turned back to Johnny. Then again so did mine and Pony's. You know for a boy that barely strung together five sentences in a day he sure was talking a lot. But apparently I was the only one in awe of that. The other two were actually focused on his words. Which apparently went along the line of he wanted to turn himself in.

"Are you serious Johnny?" I whispered one Dally had done his yelling and cussing and had pulled back out onto the road. "You're actually willing to do that?"

Johnny nodded vaguely and I felt my eyes swim with tears. Boy he sure was thoughtful and sweet sometimes! I tried not to smile much though as my thoughts were drifting to the consequences they'll both get into and well the maybe relocation of Ponyboy and I to boys and girls homes, respectively of course.

"Can anyone else smell smoke?" I asked breaking the uncomfortable silence like a knife.

"I can," Ponyboy said as the car skidded yet again to a halt a dust cloud engulfing the trees behind us.

"Oh my god the church!" I shrieked a hand clamped to my mouth in shock.

Without a second thought I watched Johnny and Ponyboy fly from the car to the church where pandemonium was breaking lose. A woman kept crying out that some children were stuck in there and a man seemed to be filling in the two on the situation. I watched on terrified as Ponyboy and Johnny ran into the house without hesitation. Dally was cursing bloody murder at them to come back and to stop being stupid. He glanced back to me but I wasn't there.

I'd jumped out of the car and ran to the burning church. Stopping metres away from it seeing the two scramble inside I ran after them ignoring the horrible curses flying my way from Dallas Winston.

"Johnny! Ponyboy watch out!" I cried out putting a hand over my mouth, I was coughing loudly, and my eyes were stinging from all the smoke and ash in the air.

I crawled through the broken window and I felt Dally grab my leg but I shook him off. My hand still over my mouth I slowly made my way through the burning church. Ponyboy and Johnny were shoving a bunch of little kids out of the window but I was still in shock that it was burning down to help. Ponyboy shook his head and told me to get out but I could barely hear him from the splintering of the wooden beams above our head.

"They're all out now get your asses out here before I skin you!" Dally roared from the window angrily. His blue eyes were blazing.

"Ponyboy!" I screamed as the beam above us which was burning cracked loudly and his back was sprayed with fire. I don't think he heard. "Pony get out!" I shouted.

I was too far away. But I think he saw the fear in my green eyes because he climbed out the window and I watched Dally put the fire out by hitting his back but Ponyboy didn't stand up after that. Johnny was making his way back to the window covering his mouth with his arm as the beam above us cracked again and the two of us screamed as it came crumbling down.

"JOHNNY!" My voice screamed mingling with Dallys.

"Johnny! Pixie!" I heard Dally shouting from somewhere near me.

I started coughing loudly. Fire was surrounding me. I couldn't even see Johnny anymore because of the thickness of the smoke. I kept coughing and my eyes were watering. Everything was blurring into the same orangey red glow. I was petrified. And I was sure if anyone glanced at me for a second they'd be able to tell. My voice was choking up it was like I couldn't even shout.

"Dally?" I said as loudly as I could muster as I heard another beam above me crack. "Dally!" I screamed with all the effort I could muster before the beam cracked again and a splitting pain ran through my leg as my body hit my floor and my head slammed against something hard and I blacked out.


	20. Chapter 20

"Now honey do you think you could tell me your name?" A woman with a cool voice asked me calmly.

I opened my eyes groggily. A blinding white light was shining in my face. The whole place looked white. The cool white linomeum tiles, the cheaply painted walls, the stark white of the doctors and nurses clothes. Their shiny fake looking white shoes, even their fake white toothy smiles. It was all white. So blinding.

"I'm Pixie," I mumbled groaning. "Pixie Elizabeth Curtis but Two-Bit calls me Pixiedust, am I at the hospital?"

The woman ignored my question and glanced down to her clipboard. "And what year is it?"

"1966,"

"And you're how old?"

"Seventeen in a month or so," I said moaning loudly as I clenched my eyes shut. "If I'm in a god damn hospital can't you do something about the pain?" I demanded moodily as I groaned again.

"Do you feel any pain?"

My eyes snapped open and I scowled at her. "I just said that!" the woman's smile faltered slightly. "My leg is killing me!"

"Yes dear it's been burnt," she replied. Why the hell did she just ask me then! "I'll go let the doctor know you're awake."

I considered muttering curse words to her as she sauntered off her fake blonde hair bouncing happily. But I withdrew all bad thoughts about her as searing pain yet again soured through my leg and I bit my lip until it was bleeding to divert the pain but it only seemed to make it worse.

"Now Pixie we'll need you to take some painkillers for the pain quite obviously," A man informed me as he walked in the room, I'm gonna guess he was Dr. Gray as that's what his badge said. "You got quite a nasty burn up your right leg but it'll heal in due time without any scarring hopefully and you'll still have full use of that leg during its healing."

"I only got burnt them?" I asked him testily. I was wary of doctors I'll admit. I hate to say it but they scare me. I mean they're the ones that tell you whether or not you're gonna die when you go here, 'course they scared me! "Nothin' else?"

"No not at all," he informed me passing me a glass of water and some odd looking white pills. "You are quite lucky you didn't get any more damage. Some bad smoke inhalation but nothing that'll harm. In fact once you've had those you can join, uh Ponyboy? Yes, Ponyboy, in the waiting room if you wish."

I nodded and swallowed the pills and took a big drink of water. "Thanks doctor, will I have to change that?" I asked him glancing down to my leg, which had a huge bandage down the right side of the right leg.

"Yes. I'll inform your guardian, your older brother it says, about it when he comes." Dr. Gray told me. "Would you like me to show you to your brother?"

"Yes please," I smiled gratefully slipping off the stiff hospital bed and slightly limping next to him. "But doctor?"

"Yes?"

"How is Johnny? And Dally?"

"Dallas Winston has a burn similar to yours on his arm, but we're keeping him in overnight," I resisted snickering when he said that. Dally would not be impressed to say the least. "We aren't able to disclose anything about Johnny Cadeto anyone but his family."

"We are his family!" I cried out looking distressed.

"I'm sorry," He told me looking pretty genuine. "There's your brother, seems he's been joined by two others."

I glanced down the corridor and saw Ponyboy being hugged to death by my two other brothers. I smiled to myself and the doctor walked away. Sodapop glanced up and his face was full of relief.

"Pixie don't you ever, _ever_ do that again! You hear me?" He cried out rushing over to me and hugging me in the same fashion.

I mumbled and pushed him off of me. "Sodapop I wanna breathe!" I said loudly as I started to cough and I waved him away. "Stop hanging over me Soda!"

Darry and Ponyboy made their way over looking filled with the same relief but Sodapop kept hanging off of me like I was some sort of, I don't know, cripple!

"You 'kay Pixie? They wouldn't tell me anything!" Ponyboy said looking peeved.

"'Course I'm okay, how are you blondie?" I asked him with a grin.

"Don't remind me," Ponyboy grumbled and Darry turned and looked at me sternly.

"Think you could've told us the truth huh Pixie?"

"And you think Dally would let me?" I replied. "He's back now ain't he!"

"We were worried to death!" Sodapop and Darry said loudly. "Emily looked freaked when me and Two-Bit went to see her at school to find out where the hell you were!" Sodapop told me.

I flushed slightly. "Sorry. But he's back!"

"Yeah and you both look like the dead," Darry muttered.

I glanced at Sodapop for confirmation and he nodded and I groaned.

"I look that bad?"

"You look awful." Sodapop said happily slinging an arm around me. "So what's that thing on your leg then?"

"Burn,"

"Ohh really?" he asked curiously staring at my leg. "Does it hurt?"

I nodded. "Well yeah."

"Can I see?" Sodapop asked eagerly. "If I poke it will it hurt?"

Darry rolled his eyes and pushed him towards the door. "I don't wanna see it and no one else does either. Poke it and I'm sure she'll slap you little buddy, now come on Ponyboy looks ready to drop."

I giggled slightly at the thought of me slapping Sodapop. I glanced to Ponyboy, he sure looked like he was dead. He was walking around looking very zombie-fied and the living dead was a pretty dead on way to describe him. Oh god did I just make a pun? I must be tired!

"C'mon Pixie, you don't look too good yourself," Darry told me quietly putting an arm 'round my shoulders. "I wish you had've told us though, at least we would've known were you were,"

"You don't wanna know," I told him my eyes wide shaking my head. "Ew there were rats!"

"Yeah you know what I mean,"

I smiled. "Uh huh I do, but hey he's back now. And I'll have you know they were gonna come backfire or not and I didn't even convince 'em. I imagine Dal would've murdered me had I."

Darry laughed slightly and opened the door to his truck and shoved me inside. "Wouldn't surprise me."

"Shh!" Sodapop said ironically then slamming the door to his side of the truck shut. "He's asleep dummies,"

I rolled my eyes and glanced down to the slumbering Ponyboy who was wedged between Sodapop and I. Not the most comfortable ride of my life but I've had worse. The time we all, by we I mean everyone, well not my parents of course but the gang and Emily, tried to wedge ourselves into Two-Bit's car…that was the weirdest experience of my life to say the least…

"_Are you serious?" I demanded my hands on my hips staring at them all as if they were insane. Then again after just telling me that I'm positive they are. "That's like a safety hazard or something!"_

_Sodapop grinned at me. "Aw now come on Pixie we're only gonna go to our house from here!"_

"_With eight other people," Emily chimed in from behind Sodapop with a happy grin on her face. "Come on we'll get to squash them!"_

"_Like you could squash anyone!" Darry laughed picking Emily up and putting her on his shoulder as she squealed in protest. "She's a stick!"_

"_Twig!" Ponyboy and Johnny taunted and I giggled slightly and Emily poked out her tongue in the usual eleven-year-old fashion._

"_Fine," I sighed loudly. "But does he really have to drive?" I demanded jabbing my thumb in the direction of Two-Bit who was now having a cartwheel race with Steve and Sodapop._

"_It's his car," Darry shrugged to me._

_I sighed loudly. "Fine just hurry up about it,"_

"_Yay!" Sodapop and Steve shouted._

_I rolled my eyes._

_Dally grinned at me and looked to the others. "So how many of us are cramming into here?"_

"_Nine!" Emily called out enthusiastically whilst Dally ruffled her hair up on Darry's shoulders. "And me and Pixie ain't gonna be on the bottom or we'll die!"_

"_Neither are Johnny or me!"_

"_Johnny or I," I corrected under my breath and Darry smiled at me._

"_Okay now you three," Two-Bit said importantly pointing to Darry, Dally and Sodapop, "Are going in the back with the girls on top of you," I couldn't help but roll my eyes but Emily giggled, "And somehow you three are going in the front."_

_I stifled my laugh, "they won't fit in the front with you, Pony should come in back,"_

"_Fine just hurry up about it, I don't want people to see me with you kids," Dally grumbled._

"_And what are you?" I asked sarcastically but he never responded._

_Then somehow we all actually fit in the car. It was actually pretty humorous now I think of it. Emily was half out the window screaming her head off at her brother and Ponyboy was half out the other window looking too scared to even shout. And I was totally squishing Dallas Winston and Sodapop but I didn't mind, they roped me into it. Actually the front looked awful appealing at that point._

"_Wow I sure never wanna be without you guys!" Emily shrieked laughing as she fell out of the car once we got to my house. "You make my life the best! Don't you reckon Pixie?"_

_Pixie. _Pixie. **Pixie!**

"What?" I cried out my eyes snapping open as I felt myself fall out the car.

"Pixie," Darry said loudly. "Come on, they're both in bed now, you fell asleep, and out of the car," he snorted slightly.

I flushed but it was too dark to see. "Oh."

"What were you dreamin' 'bout? You sure looked happy,"

"Do you remember when we all fitted inside Two-Bit's car?"

Darry laughed. "Yeah?"

"Just that…things were so perfect back then. When I was fourteen." I sighed and slowly made my way up to our house with Darry. "I can't imagine how Ponyboy copes you know, I mean he was thirteen, when I was thirteen and fourteen my life was perfect and I was so…childish."

"Weren't we all." Darry said sighing himself. "Goodnight Pixie, don't like lie on your leg, I think it might hurt."

I nodded and winced slightly as I felt the first really burning sensation run through my leg, the first outside the hospital that is. Darry never heard and disappeared off to his room and I sighed to myself and trudged upstairs to my own room and flopped onto my bed, as ashy and disgusting as I was I fell asleep in an instant. I was out like a light.


	21. Chapter 21

As soon as I woke up that morning the first thing I did was have the quickest shower I'm sure I'll ever have. I was so looking forward to getting all that dirt and grime off of my body that when I felt the water on my leg the sensation of being clean pretty much died as I felt like screaming out in pain. God it hurt.

Now I was slowly staggering downstairs yawning and rubbing my eyes sleepily. I'd tied my hair up high,and it was slowly curling on my shoulders to my annoyance. Walking into the lounge room Two-Bit's eyes burned straight through to meand he began shouting.

"Pixie look at the blonde headed monkey!" he roared with laughter pointing to Ponyboy who was trying to ignore me.

I nodded slightly. "Look at the pig," I muttered and Ponyboy and Steve snickered. I don't think Two-Bit heard.

"And where were you yesterday?" said Two-Bit suddenly interrupting my thoughts by grabbing my burnt leg.

I let out a startled scream and he instantly let go and I felt the three pairs ofeyes all on me. "Leg. Burnt." I whispered taking deep breaths. "Don't. Touch. Okay?"

"Okay." Two-Bit said nervously.

Ponyboy coughed nervously. "Didn't anyone know where Pixie was or something?"

"Nope, she good as cleared off and near gave her brothers heart attacks," Steve said looking me in the eye and I smiled apologetically and he just shook his head and gave me a small smile. "But it don't matter now the Princess is back,"

I snorted. "Hell I'm a princess."

"They sure as hell thought you were one the way they were carrying on!" Steve laughed. "Like I asked Ponyboy, how's it feel to be a hero then Miss Elizabeth?"

"Pixie."

"Elizabeth sounds posh."

I pulled a face. "Since when am I a hero anyways?"

"Saving the kids," Two-Bit filled in snatching the newspaper off of Ponyboy who scowled and tossed it to me. "In the paper and everythin'."

"Are you kidding?" I shrieked grabbing it and staring at the front cover as my face paled. "Oh my god I hate reporters!" I wailed flopping onto the couch on my stomach and shoving a cushion over my face. "They want to kill me don't they?" I asked to no one in particular moaning into the couch.

"'Course, who doesn't, sister dearest?" Sodapop said cheerily. "I'll be damned if you don't die from embarrassment once you find out you were on the television."

That was it I just started shrieking and freaking out whilst they all tried to contain their laughter. I don't know if it worked or not asI was too hysterical over the fact they took my _hideous_ school picture then _published_ it in the _newspaper_ and now I'm on the TV? THEY WANT TO SEE ME CURL UP IN THE CORNER AND SOB TO DEATH DON'T THEY? Yes I'm being dramatic. I do realize that.

"Ahh!" I moaned loudly trying to bury myself in the couch and failing.

"It's not that bad," Steve said trying to comfort me but he was grinning too much tobe ofmuch comfort.

I frowned. "It really is that bad. I'm not even a hero,"

"Sure you're not Pixiedust," said Two-Bit.

"I'm not, they did it all!" I said pointing to Johnny and Dally's pictures then to Ponyboy. "I stood there like an idiot then bloody almost suffocated myself! I'm a blooming idiot!"

"Aw hell Pixie you sure aren't an idiot." Two-Bit drawled sitting down on the floor with a big chunk of chocolate cake. "And you're alive aren't ya? And you sure are a hero for bringing the munchkins home at least."

I smiled weakly and Sodapop ruffled my hair.

"Besides you look nice in the picture sis," Sodapop said nicely as Darry strolled into the room and began putting his shoes on. "At least you weren't a blonde," Then he ducked pretty fast as Ponyboy threw something, which I'm pretty sure was a wooden spoon, at Sodapop's head.

"Still," I muttered with a sad frown on my face.

"Aw stop your moaning, Pixie," Darry said. "You're alive and well."

"Have you seen my leg?" I asked him with an evil smile on my face. "It's like all discolored and weird! And it's got pus!"

"Ew!" Two-Bit and Sodapop squealed and Darry, Ponyboy and Steve pulled disturbed looking faces.

I giggled at them. "Don't ya wanna see?"

"No." Darry said bluntly standing up.

"Come on Soda we gotta go to work!" Steve moaned heading for the door.

"Where are my shoes?" Sodapop shouted running up the stairs. "Dar have you seen 'em?"

"Now look here Ponyboy, you take it easy today if you wanna go in the rumble." Darry said sternly looking our little brother over. "You don't look so hot."

"I'm fine," Ponyboy grumbled.

"Two-Bit you take care of him you hear?"

"And me!" I chimed in throwing a look to Darry. "I'm more competent than Two-Bit!"

"What's that mean?" Two-Bit asked loudly his eyes not leaving the TV.

Darry rolled his eyes. "Yeah just make sure he don't do nothing stupid, and say hi to Johnnycakes for us,"

"Sodapop!" Steve shouted.

"I'm coming!" Sodapop yelled running past me and out the door after Steve. "Bye Two-Bit! Bye Ponyboy! Bye Pix!"

"Be careful," Darry warned finally before heading out the door after them.

As soon as they left our house fell into unnatural silence. Well other than the noises coming from the cartoon and perhaps Two-Bit's noisy eating but otherwise it was pretty silent. Ponyboy soon disappeared to change again. Don't know why but I suppose it must be nice to feel clean again after a week.

When he reappeared he announced that he wanted to go see Johnny now so I quickly pulled on my tennis shoes as I'd misplaced my Converse high tops and we dragged Two-Bit out of the door as he was very reluctant to leave his beloved. As we headed down into downtown Tulsa Two-Bit was veering us for the nearest Dairy Queen for a snack. I think his stomach is number one priority rather than Johnny and Dallas who were in hospital. Such a caring boy he is.

"Can't wait for the rumble tonight!" Two-Bit declared enthusiastically.

I frowned slightly. "Do y'all really have to fight?"

"'Course we do Pixie!" And even Ponyboy nodded. "We'll show 'em not to cross our turf and touch any of us Pixie, and then you'll never have to see their ugly mugs ever again!"

I rolled my eyes and sighed. It wouldn't lead anywhere anyway. They'd forget about the deal even if us greasers won and soon the socs would come back anyway. Rumbles were no good anyway. They solved nothing and you only ended up getting hurt for no good reasons. They knew I disapproved and what made it worse was I was always stuck at home having to be their cover if the fuzz comes sniffing around.

"Now that's one tuff car." I heard Ponyboy say as we arrived at the Dairy Queen and some sort of car, don't ask me I don't understand cars other than they're a box on wheels. "Whadda ya think Two-Bit?"

"That's very tuff," he agreed stopping to stare when he stiffened.

"I want to go inside." I said suddenly stepping behind my brother and Two-Bit as I spotted the main soc coming towards us. "Come on," I begged pushing the door open.

"Nah Pixie lets see what they have to say," Two-Bit said. I don't think he made the connection.

"Two-Bit that was him!" I whispered and Two-Bit just stood up taller trying to look tough.

"What was who?" Ponyboy asked as four socs sauntered over to us. It was like they owned the place.

"I want to talk to you." Randy announced pointing to my brother.

I opened my mouth to protest him going near my brother ever again but Ponyboy complied and told us to stay here. My eyes narrowed in frustration as Ponyboy followed Randy back to his car and the three other socs eyed us and Two-Bit started grinning and saying something about their outfits but I wasn't paying much attention. I was staring at a cloud trying to get my mind off the fact that creep was with Pony.


	22. Chapter 22

"So what did he say, Pony?" Two-Bit asked suddenly and I came back down to earth as I saw their car pull away and my eyes went back to my brother. "What did that soc want?"

"He's not a soc. He's just a guy wanting to talk." Ponyboy replied and I felt my mouth open slightly.

"Was it about the rumble?"

"Yeah, he's not gonna fight."

Okay now I was confused. My brows were furrowed slightly but I didn't contribute anything to this. Not anything that I wanted to, but Two-Bit filled Pony in on what happened on Wednesday and I said I was shocked that was all. I should have said more but I didn't. Like that he didn't change his mind on his own he just wanted his girl back but I didn't. It wasn't anything to do with us.

"We're gonna see Johnny!" Two-Bit sang out. "And we're gonna tell him how we're gonna kick those socs asses for what they did!"

Ponyboy laughed and I forced a smile onto my face. "Just don't be too rough with him Matthews, we don't know what its gonna be like when we see him, okay?" I warned him and then looked to Ponyboy who nodded. "And try not to get Dal too riled up about not coming to the rumble please."

"He'll do that on his own," Two-Bit muttered as we crossed the hospitals parking lot.

I had to agree with him there but we don't need to encourage that as he's in a public place, well kinda, and they don't need to see that. Nor do I. Greasers have bad reputations as it is andhe is not adding to it or I will probably kill him, as public embarrassment isn't the most desired thing on my list.

"Johnny Cade?" I heard Two-Bit ask the receptionist and she pointed us in the right direction when we stumbled across a doctor coming out of his room. "Hey doc is that Johnny Cades room?" Two-Bit asked loudly.

"Yes it is," he said sharing a look with the nurse. "Are you here to visit with him?"

"Yes we are sir." I said politely. "I'm Pixie Curtis and that's my brother Ponyboy, we came in with Johnny last night and us, and our friend, want to see how he's doing." I said with a smile. Politeness gets you everywhere. Dally ought to learn.

"He really shouldn't have visitors," the nurse said hugging the clipboard to her chest smiling apologetically.

The doctor looked at her. "It really wouldn't do any harm right now,"

The nurse sighed slightly. "I suppose not."

"Just try not to overwhelm him please," The doctor told us with a half smile before he left us.

The nurse eyed us slightly before she spun around on her heel and noisily walked away throwing us looks as if we were disturbing the public peace. Some people are so annoying. She was one of them.

"Hey Johnny," Two-Bit said quietly walking inside.

I sort of froze when I saw him lying there. I couldn't even cry. I was too shocked. His back looked really bad to say the least. It was like the burn on my leg but times it by a hundred. And it was all around his neck. You could tell he couldn't breath properly either. I managed a slight smile for him and Two-Bit told him he was a hero and showed him the newspaper.

"That's pretty tuff," Johnny said and I saw him smile slightly. It looked more forced than mine did before.

"But did you see my photo?" I asked him taking a seat and looking at him. "They want to kill me I swear Johnnycakes!" I said dramatically.

"She's being stupid ignore her." Ponyboy said and I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Hey ,Pony?"

"Yeah, Johnny, man?"

"I want another one of those books y'know."

I looked at Two-Bit puzzled and Ponyboy looked up at us.

"He wants 'Gone with the Wind' so I can read it to him." Ponyboy filled us in. "Do you mind getting him it?"

"Uh sure there's a gift shop downstairs somewhere," Two-Bit said and I stood up.

"We'll be back soon, Johnny," I told him with a smile as I followed Two-Bit out of the room and I sighed loudly and Two-Bit looked at me looking the most depressed I have ever seen him.

"It's bad huh, Pixiedust?"

I nodded. "Yeah," I said sadly. "I know nothing 'bout burns but I can tell you that is sure as hell worse than mine. I can't even imagine how much that's gotta hurt."

"Yeah," Two-Bit agreed walking down the stairs as I trailed behind him. "Hey Pixie you think he'll be fine though, right?" He asked me as immediately headed to the paperback section and grabbed the book instantly.

I bit my lip and shrugged my shoulders. "I'm not too sure."

"But your smart, don't you know a little about it at least?" Two-Bit asked me and I saw worry flicker through his eyes.

I watched him pay for the book and I felt a tear run down my cheek. "Oh Two-Bit, I wish I had something to tell you. To tell me. But I just don't know. Just that it looks so bad." I said sadly and Two-Bit saw my tears.

"Ya think he'll live though?"

I bit my lip again. "I don't know." I whispered wiping my eyes hurriedly. "They won't tell us anyway. We're not family."

"Bastards." Two-Bit cussed heading back up the stairs. "Like his real family gives a damn. We're more his family than they'll ever be!"

I nodded in agreement and we slipped back into Johnny's room and gave him the book, he looked no better than before if not worse. Ponyboy was hovering uncomfortably by the door when a new nurse came back in the room with a smile on her face and even smiled at us. Nice nurses are much better than rude ones that's for sure. Just seeing a smile in this scary hell hole makes it all seem so much better.

"Johnny your mothers here to see you," she said calmly looking at the few machines around his bed.

"I don't wanna see her." Johnny said bluntly.

"But she's your mother." The nurse said confusion flashing through her eyes.

"I don't wanna see her!" Johnny said before he passed out.

My eyes widened and the nurse hurried us out of the room saying it was all too much for him. Johnny's mother cussed us and called us scum. I longer to tell her my own thoughts about her but I didn't have to Two-Bit already did. He was still blowing off the steam when we came into Dally's room as he was shooing out a nurse who was looking very disgruntled at him.

"Hey Dal, how are ya feeling?" Two-Bit asked him sinking into a seat. He still looked to be fuming.

"I hate this place." Dally said simply his eyes blazing. "They want to keep me here another night, how come you got off Pixie?" he asked me and I shrugged and he cussed. "How's Johnny?"

"Passed out cold before we left." Two-Bit said sadly. "His mom wanted to see him."

"But he said no," I quickly said frowning. "They won't tell us much I don't think even if we tried. Too bad people like her can actually find out."

"Like she even cares." Dally said angrily. "Hey Matthews you still have that blade on you?"

"Yeah why?" Two-Bit asked and I could see his hand slip into his pocket and tighten over that prized switchblade of his. Stupid thing it was really.

"Give it to me." Dally said simply and I was amazed Two-Bit handed it over without a second thought. "I'm getting out of here tonight."

"Don't do anything stupid," I warned him.

"I'm doing this for Johnny, Pixie." Dally said simply staring me in the eye. "You know as well as I do that they deserve this. Just think of Wednesday and you know what I do is right."

I was torn between agreeing with him and yelling at him that it wasn't the point so I said nothing. We were finally kicked out after an hour because we were being too noisy and it was way past visiting hour when we both noticed that Ponyboy wasn't looking too good just as we hopped onto the bus.

"Pony you look awful." I said simply placing my hand on his head. He didn't even attempt to swat me away. "You're awfully hot you know. Maybe you shouldn't go in the rumble, hon,"

"Hon?" Ponyboy demanded.

"She's a sister they're weird." Two-Bit answered simply and Ponyboy didn't look embarrassed at all. After all if Two-Bit's sister did this apparently it wasn't that bad. Boys. "But you don't look too good. Darry'll kick my ass if he knows your not well and I didn't tell him."

"Then you don't know." Pony snapped and looked at me pointedly. "Neither do you."

"But I do and you shouldn't." I said stiffly crossing my arms with triumph over the fact I could at least stop him.

"Don't tell, Pixie, that's just mean." Two-Bit said looking at me pointedly and I glared at him. "Seriously that's not nice."

"Fine." I grumbled. "But if you look any worse I'm telling."

"But I won't. I'll take a couple of aspirin okay?"

"Aspirin will fix nothin'," I sang out. It wasn't the wonder Ponyboy thought it was and it wouldn't fix this but I'll let him think that at least. "He'll find out."

"Pixie, just shut up!" Both Ponyboy and Two-Bit cried out and I smirked slightly.

"You know I'm right."

"You're a right pain in the you know where," Two-Bit grumbled and I laughed and threw my arm around him.

"You love me for it."

He muttered something I couldn't hear and I just shook my head, a grin across my face. This was like old times right now and I was so thankful the hell of the past week seemed to have died. Just us three riding a bus like the good old days of the previous week and never a thought spared to the fact what the future held but now we knew and saw things we shouldn't have. But at least it was slowly becoming normal again and for that I was sure thankful for it.


	23. Chapter 23

"Ready to rumble ladies?" Two-Bit shouted when we got home as I flopped onto the couch.

"Hell yes!" Sodapop shouted.

Steve grinned. "We're gonna show those damn socs not to touch any greasers anymore!"

The boys all whooped and I groaned slightly. But I was ignored. Much like usual. I closed my eyes and pulled acushion over my head. I didn't need to see to know that they were all walking around our house getting ready. Two-Bit would be eating, Darry would be showing off his muscles, Ponyboy and Sodapop would be styling their hair and Steve would be getting all hyped up. I groaned again and squeezed my eyes shut tighter they really were gonna rumble weren't they? I cursed inside my head. I wish they wouldn't but I knew my thoughts may be voiced but not heard. I wish my parents were here. They'd stop them. Or maybe Emily…but I doubt she'd come over. She left us. Remember that, Pixie.

"Ponyboy, you don't look so hot," I heard Darry say and I threw thecushion off my head and sat up right. Maybe one would be stopped at least. "Maybe you shouldn't fight." Darry said warily.

"Aw, Darry, let him!" Sodapop moaned. "He'll be fine,"

Ponyboy nodded eagerly and I narrowed my eyes. "Yeah I'll be fine, Darry."

"Do you have to do this?"

"Yes." Came their voices, yes even Darry, I groaned louder and Darry just rolled his eyes. "Pixie, just understand."

"I don't want to!" I snapped. "And I don't want to have to cover for you either! You're all like a bunch of god damn hoods fighting!" I told them angrily. "You think Mom and Dad would've encouraged this?"

They all looked pretty offended when I called them hoods but Darry turned a nasty shade of green when I mentioned our parents.

"Pixie, maybe they wouldn't of," Darry began coolly. He was pissed. "But Dad always said a little fight won't hurt,"

"Little?" I exclaimed snorting. "Dar, when you lot come home with black eyes and broken ribs do _not_ expect me to help, after all they're only little!" I sai angrily standing up. "Idiots," I muttered walking into the kitchen to get away from them.

"Aw stop being a moody cow, Pixie." Two-Bit said walking over to me and ruffling my hair. I scowled at him. "We'll be fine don't you worry."

"I'm not." I said crossing my arms.

Two-Bit raised his brows. "You're lying. Just cut out the storminess, 'kay? It doesn't go over too well with your brothers, who _you_ nearly gave heart attacks yesterday so cool it."

I mumbled something and Two-Bit smiled at me.

"Thanks, Pix."

I rolled my eyes and went back into the lounge room and walked over to Darry hesitantly and he just looked at me curiously, I think he wantedto know what I was going to say.

"Darry, can I please have the keys to the truck?" I asked him in a low voice.

He looked me in the eye. "What are you going to do, Pixie?"

"I need to say goodbye," I whispered sadly. "Please Darry just let me. I can't stay here. Not alone, I want to. Please."

"You think its that bad?"

I nodded and bit my lip. "I don't want the others to know…not yet, I'll tell them. He'll be good for awhile maybe, but Dar I just need to do this for myself. For him. You gotta let me."

"Fine, bye, Pixie," he murmured handing them over and walking me to the door. "Just...Pixie, just stay safe, okay?"

I nodded and smiled sadly. He nodded and I quickly walked down our porch. I don't think my absence was yet noticed I didn't want to make it a big deal. I quickly started up the truck's engine and pulled out onto the street and drove down the street. Glancing in the rear view mirror I could see Darry's eyes still on the truck before he disappeared back into the house.

Sighing to myself I made my way through Tulsa to the hospital. The sun was disappearing and it was soon pitch black. I glanced up to the stars and sighed at the thought maybe he'd never see them again…I held back my thoughts as I parked the car and got out. I quickly ran into the building as the skies began spitting out rain and as soon as I stepped inside it got heavier.

I shook out my hair and asked the woman at the front desk politely if I'd be able to visit Johnny Cade as it was very important and she let me, even though it was after hours. As I went upstairs to his floor I saw that doctor again and he just gave me a sad smile and my heart began pounding faster as I reached his room and pushed open the door.

"Hey, Johnny," I said softly closing the door quietly. "It's Pixie."

"I know," his raspy voice whispered and I could see him smile. "They all at the rumble then?"

"Yeah," I sighed pulling up a chair. "And you know me, I'm not a fan,"

Johnny chuckled slightly then coughed and my eyes widened with worry.

"Johnny, are you okay?" I asked him reaching for his hand. "That cough don't sound too good,"

Johnny just gave me a sad smile, it looked so forced. "I don't look very good do I, Pixie? It's really bad ain't it?"

I nodded and I felt my lip tremble and my face began to dampen and Johnnycakes squeezed my hand and I began sobbing quietly to myself but it became increasingly louder.

"I'm sorry," I whispered nervously trying to wipe my eyes.

"Don't be. I know I'm not going to make it,"

"Please don't say that," I begged tearfully. "Oh Johnny, I love you so much you can't leave us."

"You've seen me." Johnny whispered his voice sounding even raspier. "I can't. Even if I do I can't do nothin',"

I nodded and sobbed again and didn't bother to wipe the tears away. "Johnny, I really love you so much, you're like my other little brother even though I never told you that. You are such a sweet kid really, you are the sweetest there is, you deserve so much even though you got so little," I said as my voice started to choke up. "You are the best kind of person there I, you are worth so much, Johnny," I whispered in his ear. "J-Just always know that you are worth your weight in gold, Johnnycakes. You have that golden halo on your head. It'll guide you to the best places. You'll see the most beautiful things."

Johnny smiled at me, her was crying too.

"Rainbows and you'll get to see all those clouds and see what they taste like!" I said with a sad laugh. "And my parents are gonna see you, Johnny, and they'll love you even more so than before, and they're gonna take you in their arms andhug you and kiss you and love you like you deserve. You're going into the best place in the world, Johnnycakes." I whispered the wet tears streaming faster and faster.

"Thank you, Pixie." Johnny coughed out. "You're like my sister too. I love you like one too." He flushed and I smiled at him.

"You're such a beautiful person," I whispered squeezing his hand.

I couldn't say anymore. I just watched his body slowly move up and down with every struggled breath he took. He just looked thankful that someone was there. His black eyes meeting my green ones and for once in his life his fearful eyes weren't there but ones of peacefulness.

"I'm going somewhere great." Johnny gasped. "Thank you."

I nodded with my sad smile. I was still crying. "The best of places. Say hi to my mom and dad please."

"Yeah."

"I love you." I whispered kissing his cheek.

"I want to do this alone." He said struggling over the words and my lip trembled as I nodded. "Goodbye, Pixie Curtis."

"Goodbye, Johnny Cade. I love you with all my heart." I told him as the tears formed thicker down my face as I kissed his cheek again. "I'll tell the boys you love them. Goodbye, Johnny." I said in a whisper as I walked away. My eyes meeting his once again and they were at peace. His mind was finally at rest with what was going to come.

As I closed the door I broke down in tears and was sobbing loudly. No one said anything as my body shook with sadness and my hands and every bit of me trembled with hysteria. As I stumbled outside I sat down behind the wheel of Darry's truck and leaned back against the seat and crawled up against the door and cried to myself in deep despair. Johnny was going to go. And he was going out alone. Sobbing I closed my eyes and took a calming breath.

I love Johnny Cade. But why did he have to do it alone?


	24. Chapter 24

I eventually arrived home about a half-hour since Johnny told me he wanted to be alone. I had dried all my tears and managed to compose myself as best as I could because I didn't want to worry the guys anymore than I need to that Johnny would…well I'm sure you knew because I don't feel like saying that word, its too…sudden. Blunt. Not right.

I slid out of Darry's truck and made my way up the porch and opened the front door when Two-Bit immediately grabbed me and swung we around and Steve and Sodapop were cheering and laughing loudly. I forced a smile onto my face but it was so fake andobvious that it was that Darry pushed him off me.

"Pixie, you okay?"

I bit my lip and shook my head. My eyes welled up and I kept shaking my head. "N-no. Did you win then?' I asked forcing myself to smile again.

Darry nodded and stared at me. "What happened?"

"Doesn't matter," I shrugged him off as I sat down on the couch.

"Where'd you go?" Sodapop asked me.

"What happened?" Darry demanded before Sodapop could get a word in edgewise. "Pixie, something must have happened!"

My lip trembled as I looked up to Darry in the eye. "I had to say goodbye, Darry," I whispered.

"Goodbye to who?" Sodapop and Two-Bit asked loudly.

Darry sighed slightly, his face frowning. "Johnny." He said simply. "What did he say?"

"Wanted to be alone," I sobbed my face in my hands as my whole body shook with my tears. Darry put his arm around me but I calmed down eventually. I don't think the other three even understood what we meant.

"Pixie, calm," Darry whispered in my ear after I wiped my eyes and my breathing slowed down. "It'll be alright."

_No it won't_, I thought. But I let myself believe him anyway. When you are near hysterics you believe most things. Darry rubbed my hand and then stood up suddenly when our front door banged open and I realized that Ponyboy wasn't here.

"Pony, where haveyou been?" Darry said interrupting my exact thoughts to explaining his absence.

I looked at him worriedly as he himself looked pretty shaken up. "It's Johnny." I froze. "He's dead. He just, I dunno, died or something."

"Where's Dallas?" Darry asked looking pretty freaked out himself. I mean it was Johnny. How could he be dead! I felt like screaming that but I held it in. For Pony's sake.

"He just freaked out and left," Ponyboy shrugged and sat down besides me.

Without hesitation I threw my arms around my little brother and squeezed him in a tight hug. He didn't even resist or tell me off for being motherly like he would've just one week ago. He welcomed me over and mywarmth for him and held back onto me as I heard him sniff. He was just as upset as I was. Probably more and I think he was thinking the same thing I was. Stuff the guys, right now was the time for tears.

"So, Johnnycakes, is really gone then?" Sodapop asked cautiously to no one in particular and someone must have nodded because I saw him kick a chair. "Dammit!" he exclaimed.

I looked him in the eye. My green eyes meeting with my twins and he just frowned and so did I. I couldn't express much in my eyes. I imagine they were full of emptiness. I don't think I could have even held sadness in them because I was too in disbelief that it was happening. Why does it have to happen to us! I wanted to scream and shout but before I had the chance our phone rang breaking the silence within our house.

"Darry, its for you," Steve said suddenly, he was the first to pick it up.

"Hello?" Darry said walking into the kitchen. I would say to hear better but well I doubt that as it was pretty damn silent right now. "Okay we'll meet you in the park. Bye."

I watched Darry hang up the phone and shake his head bitterly. "The fuzz are after Dally, he held up a store. C'mon we're meeting him in the park."

Without a moments hesitation the guys all bounded out the door, Sodapop in his socks and all. I followed them and they sprinted down the street to the park by Two-Bit's house. I ran after them as fast as I could muster. Ponyboy wasahead of us sprinting his heart out as we heard the sirens of the fuzz and we were on the street of the park as I heard Darry shout out 'NO!' and the sounds of guns shooting.

I saw Dally's face as his body was riddled with the bullets from the officers guns and a shout escaped his lips as Ponyboy shouted that it wasn't loaded. And I let out a scream as the boys around me shouted out to stop and I felt Two-Bit grab me and shield my sight by his body as he hugged me tight. Then I screamed out as Dally's body hit the ground and I was hugged tighter as I broke down in tears.

Everything was going in slow motion. The scream from a girl on the other side of the park. My eyes scanned the area for the sound of the voice seeing a glimpse of dark brown hair running. Dally's body hitting the ground. The footsteps as the officers ran over. My brothers and friends have looks of distress slowly transforming the happy smiles of their faces. Ponyboy's face paling before he hit the road as he passed out. My own body screaming out as my best friend cradled my body as I felt my own mind spin out of control with emotions and I hit a world of darkness for the second time in two days.

-

-

-

"Pixie? Hey, Pixiedust, you're okay now, you just kinda fainted," Two-Bit told me in a low voice, a half smile on his face. "I had to carry you in here myself 'cause Darry had Pony. You 'kay now, Pixiedust?"

I nodded and mumbled something as I rubbed my eyes. "Two-Bit?" I whispered.

"Yeah?" He asked as he placed me on one of those uncomfortable waiting seats.

"Did they really…"

"Yeah." He whispered his grey eyes full of sadness. "You're alright now. You wouldn't stop screaming then I dunno, you blacked out. Pony hit the ground, they reckon someone hit his head in the rumble."

I nodded sleepily and looked around. "Where's Pony?"

"They're just checking him over, don't worry." He said squeezing my hand. "He's just outta it that's all. He's a little sick."

"Okay," I yawned as Two-Bit's hand squeezed tighter around mine and I held it tighter back. "So I didn't break your back or nothing?" I asked him distractedly. I wasn't that with it at that point in time.

"Nope you're as light as a feather," Two-Bit said staring down at our hands. "Can't believe they're both dead, you know?"

"Two in one night." I whispered. "It's like losing our parents all over again. But worse because we never thought thatit'd ever happen again."

Two-Bit nodded. "But both of 'em. One's bad enough. And then you just fainted and Ponyboy blacked out and he's not awake, and oh, Pixiedust, don't do that again please," he begged as he held my hand tighter and I felt the need to hold it even tighter back.

"I won't. Not ever." I promised.

Two-Bit smiled with relief. "That's good then."

I nodded but before I could say anything Darry and Sodapop came out of a room and walked over to us and I smiled at them half-heartedly my eyes drooping shut. Like I said I wasn't back to myself yet.

"You're awake," Sodapop said sounding relieved and I saw him eye my hand clasped with Two-Bit's and he eyed Two-Bit but Darry just looked at him.

"They're keeping Pony here overnight, Pixie," Darry told me. "Go home with Two-Bit and Steve once he comes back, get some sleep, we'll be home in the morning, okay?" he said feeling my forehead. "You'll be fine."

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked him curiously.

"I think she's a bit, uh…" Two-Bit said thinking of the word.

"Still dreaming." Darry said and Two-Bit nodded. "Just look out for her, okay? We'll see you tomorrow." And he kissed the top of my head.

Sodapop smiled sadly and trailed after Darry down the corridor and into a room. I yawned loudly and Two-Bit pulled me up and I spotted Steve walking towards us and I suddenly remembered everything and felt my lip quiver.

"I want to go home," I whispered as a tear ran down my cheek slowly.

Two-Bit glanced at me and I think he instantly realized I was back to normal. "Come on, Steve, she needs to sleep. So do you, man. Was it that bad?"

"I want to throw up." Was Steve's reply as he just walked at a fast pace towards the ground floor. "Hurry up or I seriously will." Steve said looking rather green as we hurried out to Steve's car in the parking lot.

"Come on, Pixie," Two-Bit said kindly sitting in the back with me.

I tried to smile but gave up and stared out of the window on the ride home. I felt my eyes slowly shut. I opened them and blinked hard a few times to stay awake but I kept drifting off to sleep. I jolted to the world of the living when Steve slammed the car door at our house and I dragged my feet into the house behind Two-Bit and crawled into my room and into my bed and fell asleep. It was one of the most peaceful sleeps I'll admit I've had since my parents passed. Because as soon as I shut my eyes I knew instantly that two souls were finally at a rest.


	25. Chapter 25

"Ponyboy's coming home today, Pixie," Two-Bit told me with a forced smile as he stood in front of the TV.

I grunted in response and waved my arms at him, telling him to move out of the way. He didn't budge. I wasn't talking. What was I meant to say? I'd lost my big brother and my little brother in one night and they expect me to act like normal? I wasn't normal. I was feeling depressed I didn't want to feel happy and I damn well would do as I pleased.

"Pixiedust, you've gotta talk, hon," Two-Bit pleaded with me. "Darry and Sodapop won't be happy if you don't at least try act normal for Pony."

I just crossed my arms huffily.

"Please, Pixie? For Dally and Johnny?"

I just glared at him for mentioning their names like that. "I hate you. Leave me alone." I said sharply standing up and marching to the door.

"Pixie!" Two-Bit groaned loudly. He didn't even take it seriously. Damn him! "Pixie, don't you dare." He warned.

I just scowled even more and opened the door to be faced in the eye with my twin brother who was looking at me curiously.

"Hi, Pixie, you feeling better now?" Sodapop asked me weakly looking pretty crushed himself.

I shook my head and my lip quivered.

"Oh, Pixie." He whispered sadly holing my face in his hands. "You will talk won't you? Not like Mom and Dad again, please don't." He begged sadly.

I nodded and Sodapop looked like he was going to cry.

"Pixie, you can't do this. You have to talk. You can't do this again!" Sodapop said sounding angry.

"I have to!" I snapped pulling away from my brother and running outside. "You don't get it, dammit!" I shouted to Sodapop. "This is all my fault! I did this! I may as well be dead, Sodapop Curtis, I screw up everything. I'm worth nothing! Jason was right all along, I'm useless and worth nothing and I don't deserve nothing, Sodapop!" I shouted venting out every bit of anger inside me. "No one could ever love me, really, they'll just use me 'cause I may as well be trash! It's no wonder Jason tried it with me because I'm nothing!" I screamed angrily as the tears flowed down my face. "You just don't get it, I really am nothing, Sodapop, and he was right and that's why he tried it with me!"

I was crying full out now and my face was red with anger and outrage. Every horrible thought inside of me was just screamed out at my brother. Everything I had wanted to vent out since my parents had died had just come out and Sodapop was staring at me like you'd never believe, and so was Two-Bit who'd followed us out.

"You just don't understand, okay?" I snapped angrily and spun around. "So just don't! Why won't you all stop trying to be all fine like when Mom and Dad were alive! They ain't coming back they're dead, okay? I don't need another mom or dad, mine are dead and I don't want replacements, I just want you all to leave me alone!"

With that I continued down the street barely noticing the fact that Darry's truck was parked in our drive and every person important to me had just heard that as even Steve had been walking down the street.

I was sobbing loudly but I tried to keep my head high as I walked away but Sodapop was the first to break the strange silence that had taken over our entire street. Even the Cades weren't making a single sound.

"What did he do to you, Pixie?" Sodapop asked, his voice sounding strangely calm yet scared.

I turned around, my hair flipped around so fast as my head spun around my focus wasblurry from my tears and my face tearstained.

"He tried to have sex with me, but being me I said no and he wanted it more. You happy now?" I demanded my voice cracking. "Because I'm just good little Pixie Curtis who doesn't talk back and does all her work because she wants to get out of this shit hole." I told him sarcastically.

"Pixie, stop being like this."

"Why?" I demanded. "Aren't I allowed to scream or do I have to keep it all inside like the perfect damn housewife?" I asked him my eyes blazing. "Screw that, Sodapop, just leave me alone! Please?" I said pleadingly. "I don't need this right now. I don't need none of this." I whispered shakily. "Soda, please don't."

Sodapop said nothing and just came down the road and held me as I broke down in his arms. I had nothing left to shout or vent about, it had all come out. I held no anger. Just sadness. As Sodapop held me in his arms I cried my heart out to him and he whispered the thing to me that made it all seem like that it doesn't matter as long as I was withmy brother it would all be fixed itself.

"Pixie, you did what you thought was right and that's all that matters. Not anything else. We all need to shout sometimes. I love you." He whispered in my ear before he made me walk back to the house.

I couldn't meet anyone in the eye. They couldn't meet mine either. Ponyboy wasn't taking his any better than I was but I was slowly beginning to accept the fact that Dallas Winston would never come sauntering in the door again bragging about his latest catch or the shy smile of Johnny Cade at a joke made by one of the guys. It was hard but Sodapop finally told me before he made me have a sleep that one thing was important. That they may be gone for now but one day we'll meet them again, and they'll be looking forward to that but for now we had so much they wanted us to do. They'll be waiting for us at the end. And to reach the end we had to make it through the now.

With that he kissed my head and pulled my blankets over me. As my door clicked shut I didn't fall asleep but instead stared at the ceiling counting the cracks. Every crack told a different story of how it appeared, through someone slamming their door through argument or through excitement. Just like how every smile held a story. Johnny Cade and Dallas Winston would leave us with a smile. Thinking of the story their lives told. That's how I would die I decided there and then. Not thinking of the bad but only ever of the good. Once I made it through the now with Sodapop and my brothers and the gang I'd look forward to the end by thinking of the story I weaved. Because that's what matters isn't it? What you did in the now, not what you did in the end.


	26. Chapter 26

It had been over a week since my two best friends had passed away and only with time will your wound heal. It hadn't been the best week of my life but I was accepting it more with everyday I didn't see their faces. I had to accept it. I had to accept it for Ponyboy to be able to accept it.

As I sit in my room now this Sunday morning I stare into my mirror into the green eyes of the girl in front of me. I brush her hair away from her face and tie it up high, even putting a black ribbon in it, standing out from her chocolate brown hair. I rub at her eyes nervously as they are red and puffy from tears. I wipe at her freckled cheeks to wipe away all the splashes of tears. I nervously straighten her white blouse and her black skirt and fix that silver locket around her neck so it sits right.

I nervously open the girl in the mirror's locket and smile slightly at the pictures the girl holds inside it. The one of her parents and the one of the two boys who should have been born brothers. I watch the girl in the mirror smile back and see that lone tear run down her cheek again. As I stand up she stands up. That girl in the mirror is me. No matter how much I wish right now that I wasn't going to Johnnycakes and Dally's funerals I can't deny the fact I am. Playing make believe doesn't work anymore, because they are never coming out from the door and shouting 'BOO!' ever again.

I slip my stocking feet into a pair of my mothers black high heels and open my bedroom door fiddling with the plain silver ring my mother gave me for my thirteenth birthday. I'd only worn it once before. Right now was the right time for it again. I wish I never have to wear it again, for that one wish I'd be truly satisfied.

I walked down the hall of our second floor and walk down our stairs into our lounge room. Two-Bit looked up, looking very uncomfortable in his black suit, and gives me a sad smile but it's a smile all the same and smiles are very welcomed in this household right now.

Steve looks at me nervously from the other end of the couch and Darry barely moved an inch, not even his gaze leaves the wall at which he is staring at. I walked past them both and into the kitchen. Sodapop is sitting at the table nervously awaiting the funeral by drinking chocolate milk. He gives me a smile, its not sad, but its happy. Because he knows that this is right. It needs to be done. I think he's the only one that understands that. As I give him back that smile, mine being more saddened than his, I watch Ponyboy walk into the kitchen looking more depressed than usual. He takes no notice of us and walks out just as fast as he came in.

As Darry instructs us all that its time to leave I follow my brothers outside to their cars along with Steve and Two-Bit when Darry placed a hand on my shoulder and stared into my eye with a sad little smile on his face.

"Pixie, do you mind going with them?" He asked me and I shook my head. "Thank you, Pixie." Then he paused hesitantly, "I love you, Pixie, you do know that, right? Last week just showed me that I need to tell you that more often. I'm not trying to be our parents. I swear."

I nodded and smiled sadly at my oldest brother. "I know, Darry. I love you too, I just was being silly,"

"You had a point, Pixie." He whispered patting my shoulder before he got in the truck with my two other brothers.

I just nodded and slipped into the back seat of Steve's car and closed the door. But the silence in the car was just too much for me. Not even music was being played I had to break it. I'd been surrounded by silence too much lately. We needed to start going back to normal. If this one conversation would help you can bet I'd start it then.

"Is Emily coming?" I asked softly but they heard me.

"I haven't seen her in years." Steve stated.

Two-Bit shrugged. "She sure knows. My mom can't, she tried. Emily has been weird all week. My mom doesn't know what's wrong with her. But she knows about this. She just never said what she was doing."

"How?"

"Moping around." Two-Bit said with a wave of his hand. "Probably boy blues."

"She's never had one." I said without meaning too and I turned red and Two-Bit turned and stared at me. "She's never had one, a boyfriend, I mean."

"Oh." He said raising his brows and saying nothing else.

The rest of the ride was deadly silent as I stared out the window watching trees and buildings fly by. As we arrived at the church I felt my stomach tie up in knots and I felt physically sick at the mere thought of this.

Inside the church not that many people had showed up past us. The Cades had fronted up as well as another couple and a boy and a girl who were with the Cades. None of us knew Johnny had other family but from the look of it they weren't from around here anyway. Sylvia had fronted up as well as Tim Shepard and a few other greasers but other than them it was just us.

Not even Emily had ended up showing.

In the church I sat wedged between Sodapop and Two-Bit saying nothing just staring at my hands. No one wanted to say anything. None of us knew what to say. I knew what to say but I was going to say that when I was by myself. With nothing to say it was a pretty short funeral service and we were by their graves quite a lot quicker than we were when we buried my parents.

As we walked out the church we walked along a winding gravel path to a peaceful place underneath an old tree where two holes had already been dug out. My stomach twisted again inside of me but I just clenched my fists to hold that and my tears back.

I was surrounded, and towered over, by what was left of our gang as we stood around the graves the coffins made their way over. The priest was beginning to say a few more words as they began to lower both coffins and I bit my lip to hold back my tears. The others weren't crying so neither would I.

"Would anyone like to say anything?" The priest asked us kindly.

Before Darry could answer him politely, like I'm sure he was intending to, someone shouted at us to wait. We all turned around and two fourteen year old girls were running over to us. And one of them was Miss Emily Matthews.

"Wait!" She shouted running over, a girl with pretty light brown hair right behind her. "Wait for me." She whispered as she stopped by the open graves looking very flushed.

"Sorry?' The priest asked her looking confused.

"We were late." The other girl supplied as Emily looked very flustered and the other girl looked apologetic. "Got a bit lost, sorry," she said putting her arm around Emily whose eyes were staring at the two coffins as they began to fill with tears.

"That's alright," he said kindly and looked to us all collectively again. "Would anyone like to say any final goodbyes? Any more words?"

"That's alright," Darry informed him politely when Emily interrupted him.

"I do," she whispered nervously.

My own eyes were on her and Darry was staring at her like he'd never seen her before. I'm not even sure if he recognized her. Ponyboy I'm not sure was even aware of her presence and both Sodapop and Steve had their mouths wide open. Like I've said, Emily wasn't eleven anymore.

"Please go on." The priest said kindly and Emily's friend squeezed her hand.

"I want to tell them I'm sorry." Emily said sounding very choked up as her friend held her hand tighter. "I'm sorry that I wasn't there for the past few years to just be with them as friends." Emily said her voice cracking and she finally started crying. "And to Dally that I listened to what he said, I'm gonna do what he told me to do." Then she laughed nervously. "And they really are perfect together too. He was right." Then she began sobbing loudly and that set me off.

"Em, you need to finish it," her friend whispered to her. "You said you would of."

Emily nodded with determination but the tears fell freely from her face and mine. "And Johnny, you were the best person in this world and you deserved so much more than you got and I'm so sorry you had to see me like that."

Emily just stopped speaking as she was crying so loudly and heavily she didn't look like she'd continue. The Cades and most of the others had wandered off. I don't think they wanted to see the hysteric tears of a teenage girl but she was only setting me off and she wasn't calming even though her friend really looked to be trying.

I took a deep breath and spoke up. "You both meant so much to all of us and we'll miss you both so much. And Dally, she's done what's right. She came back." I whispered quietly as the priest passed us all some of that dirt and we threw it over.

I watched Emily throw it and she sniffed and threw a letter on Johnny's grave before Steve walked away containing his own grief. I glanced to Emily and watched her in the arms of her friend who was crying too. Two-Bit had walked over to his sister and was hugging the two teenaged girls and I felt Sodapop's arms go around me.

"She's done what's right. She looks different but she's still Emily." He told me with a sad smile. "They're better off now. I knew you'd talk properly."

"I knew I would too." I whispered as I ran a hand through my hair.

"I didn't think she'd show, you know." Two-Bit told me as he squeezed my hand.

I nodded and stifled my sobs. "Neither. But she's here."

Emily's friend had broken away from her and was smiling sadly and trying to offer condolences to her when Darry stepped in. It was the most beautiful thing I had actually ever seen. He just took her in his arms like a brother should take a sister. But it was just the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen as Darry saw her as he always had. A kid and even though he hadn't seen her for all these years he did what was right. Accept her coming back without a second thought to the reason.

I smiled sadly and fell into Two-Bit's arms as I cried softly to myself.

"It's for the best now you know," The girl told me and Two-Bit.

Two-Bit looked at her. "What's for the best?"

"This." She said with a wave of her hand to the two fresh graves that they were filling in. "From what Emily's told me at least they'll be in a happier place than in Tulsa."

I nodded. "Yeah they will." I whispered as Two-Bit wandered off. None of the others understood what I had meant by that when I'd tried to say it before asides from Sodapop.

"You know what's the best thing?" The girl asked me.

I stated her in the eye and smiled softly. "What?"

"They'll always be forever young. Captured in the best place of their lives. In their youth." She told me with a genuine smile. "Always to be youth. It's for the best. If only Emily would believe me."

"But it is," I whispered as I began crying again. "Thank you, uh?"

"Ashley," she told me before wandering back over to Emily and I looked to the two fresh graves my lip trembling with the fresh floods of tears that seem to be never-ending.

As I looked to the two patches of earth in between the lush green grass of Tulsa Cemetery I didn't bother to wipe away my tears. There lay two of my best friends. An older brother and a little brother. Dallas Winston and Johnny Cade. The rebel and the puppy. I smiled sadly as I knelt down by the graves. Ignoring the fact I was wearing my good skirt and a pair of tights. Sitting on the grass I looked at the graves and my body shook with tears.

They were finally at a resting place. It was time for me to say goodbye but I couldn't bear to part with them. That little bit of me that was holding onto them had gone away. They were truly gone and I'd finally began to accept that fact. Looking at the two places in the earth that would be forever theres I thought of what Emily's friend Ashley said. It was true. They might not be around forever but they had something I know they would have wanted. Youth. They would always be young. Forever Young.

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**A/N: **I updated sooner than I expected and I feel like crying. This is the last chapter of _Forever Young_ and I will dearly miss posting it. I have the first few chapters of the sequel written up and I'll be posting that as a new story soon enough I promise. I want to thank every single person who reviewed me, it was much appreciated, and that was what has encouraged me to keep on with my writing. Anyway, this is so sad for me right now, but I hope you've enjoyed the story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Now please give me that one last review!

Much love,

Rachel


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